When Should You Ask Someone to Be Your Bridesmaid?

After your S.O. proposes, how soon do you pop the question to your 'maids?

Updated 04/09/18

Briana Moore

One of the most exciting parts about getting engaged is sharing the news with every single person you know. After you and your new fiancé have properly celebrated this milestone and basked in all the excitement, you’ll send pictures, make (so many) FaceTime calls, and post ring selfies on your Instagram so that the people in your life can celebrate with you.

You might even be eager to sit down and start planning, picking your wedding date, venue, color scheme, and dress, all within the first week of getting engaged. But one decision you should take a minute to make? Deciding on your bridesmaids and Maid of Honor.

Even if you’re eager to tell a handful of your closest pals that they are part of your bridal party, you don’t want to rush handing them an invitation, especially until you know more details about your big day and you’ve thought it through for a bit.

Here are four things you should do before selecting your. bridal squad

Wait Until You Know Your Wedding Date

Before popping the question to your bridesmaids-to-be, first wait until you know your wedding date. Knowing your wedding date will let your bridesmaids have a better idea over whether or not they can commit to being your bridesmaid. The date might come at a bad time for them personally, with another bridesmaid or wedding commitment, or with a major life change they are expecting, like a baby or a move, that might not be able to have them saying "I do" to being a bridesmaid.

Take a Few Weeks to Think About It

Picking your bridesmaids should be a decision that comes with a lot of thought. If your wedding is going to happen a year or two after your engagement, take the time to really think about the people in your life and who you want there for you throughout the entire wedding adventure. If you’re deciding between 10 to 15 people, start to think about the people who you know will be a friend of yours for life and will be able to help you with your wedding details here and there, over the next couple months.

Know as Many Wedding Details as You Can

Before picking your wedding crew, try to know as many details as you can about the kind of bridal shower and bachelorette party that you want. Details like that might determine how big of a bridal party you want and it will allow you to ask your friends to be your bridesmaid with enough information that they will be able to feel good about taking on this role and excited about your wedding.

Be Engaged for at Least 60 Days

To prevent rushing this decision, give yourself a 60-day grace period where you don’t pop the bridesmaid question to any of your friends. During that time, start planning out your wedding, deciding how many bridesmaids you actually want, and thinking about things what kinds of gifts you want to give them when the time comes to ask them to be your bridesmaid.

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