What Your Maid of Honor Doesn’t Want You to Know—Ever

They will take these secrets to the grave, or at least wait until after your honeymoon to tell you what really went down

Updated 06/20/18

Photo by Westlund Photography

One of the most interesting parts of planning your wedding is assigning roles to the people in your bridal party best suited to their strengths. You might ask a friend or two to be in charge of DIY centerpieces, a family member to be responsible for handing out vendor tips at the end of the night, or a sibling to help make sure that you stay calm throughout the entire night. But one person that you’ll likely turn to the most throughout the entire wedding adventure is your maid of honor. Your BFF and head of your bridal party will be put in charge of a lot of things, from planning the bachelorette party to helping you pick out the perfect wedding dress.

Because being a maid of honor is a big responsibility, there may be some things she decides to keep from you so that you make it down the aisle without any extra stress. Here are five main things your maid of honor doesn’t want you to ever find out.

Things That Went Wrong

While you might be crossing your fingers that your wedding day is completely perfect, chances are something will go wrong. And when it does, your maid of honor will be the first person to know about it. Whether it’s a melted cake that’s been delivered or a bridesmaid who forgot her dress back home, your maid of honor will be the go-to person for any and all pop-up problems, last-minute challenges, and wedding day mishaps. If you have no idea any that those things are going on during your wedding, your maid of honor is doing her job (and may never tell you about it!).

How Much It All Cost

Being a maid of honor often comes with a hefty price tag. Even if you think you know how much your MOH is spending, from her dress to the bachelorette party to her gifts, there are a lot of little things along the way that often get swiped on the maid of honor’s credit card. Whether it’s buying decorations for the bridal shower, paying for transportation at the bachelorette party, or even having to get her dress altered, these things add up. We suspect if the bride ever knew how much her MOH spent, she'd think her friend was planning a mini-wedding on the side.

The Wedding Party Drama

Personalities blend and clash within any bridal party. It’s usually your maid of honor’s role to handle any of the drama that’s happening inside of the bridal party. Whether it’s email chains about the bachelorette party in which some ’maids are threatening to boycott, or text messages about how one bridesmaid feels like she deserves to bring a plus one, your MOH is secretly fielding a lot of the tension among your crew that you hope doesn't spill over to the wedding day.

She Might Have Winged the Toast

Giving a toast at the reception can be a nerve-racking experience for any best man or maid of honor, and even though you’ve given your BFF lots of time to plan for the speech, it may have been left on the back burner. She might have wrestled with writer’s block for a while and decided just to wing it. Either way, if the speech goes well, you may never find out how much time she really put into writing it.

The Open Bar Was Her Hiding Place

Once the ceremony is over, your maid of honor might be celebrating that her duties are practically accomplished, which means that the open bar might become her hiding place for the night. She may not tell you how many shots of tequila she had or glasses of champagne she snuck before the ceremony, but as long as she’s having fun at the reception, know that’s all that really matters.

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