Money is hard to talk about, whether it's with your partner or between friends. Add on the fact that weddings and pre-wedding activities (ahem, the bachelorette party) can really add up—even when you aren't the bride—and it's a sticky situation just waiting to happen. So what's a girl to do if she's gotten an invite to a bachelorette bash that's way out of her budget? We've got a few ideas.
It's hard to say no to a bachelorette party weekend. Who wants to miss the fun, the stories, or the memories? But if you know your budget is tight, ask a few questions before you RSVP with an enthusiastic "YES!" Get in touch with the 'maid in charge of planning to see if she has an idea of what the weekend will cost. Are you splitting a $400/night Airbnb eight ways? Or is the plan to sleep two-to-a-room at a luxe resort? And don't forget to ask about activities—anything from a fancy night out to a guided excursion will definitely add to the trip's bottom line. Then, with a total estimate in hand, decide if it's something you can commit to or if you'd be better off putting those funds toward your flight and hotel for the actual wedding.
It's also worthwhile to get in touch with the other invited guests. If a few of you are in a similar position, you may be able to squeeze some extra girls into a hotel room or make plans to share taxis and other transportation to help minimize costs. Keep the bridesmaid who has done most of the planning in the loop, because if it turns out more than half of the guests are worried about the weekend costing way too much, it might be prudent to adjust some plans so everyone is comfortable and ready to join in.
There's also nothing wrong with deciding it just won't work for you—and this doesn't mean you love your friend any less. Be honest and let her know you're keeping an eye on your bank account so you don't miss the main event (you know…her wedding!), then see if you can plan a bachelorette day for two. Grab lunch or dinner at your favorite spot, get your nails done, or simply spend some time together laughing and chatting before her big day arrives. You'll still get to celebrate this milestone in her life without breaking the bank.