Wait. Are Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson dating? Just kidding. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know the famous couple are engaged after only four weeks. If you’re wondering if that is soon to be getting hitched, you’d be correct. It’s fast.
Twitter is awash with speculation as to why the couple fell so hard, so quickly. Many are citing Davidson’s “Big Dick Energy” while posting videos of him doing normal person things such as fixing his collar.
What is Big Dick Energy (BDE), you ask? Definition: Davidson has the air of someone who has a huge penis. Further meaning: A super confident person. Further, further meaning: He has the confidence because he has a giant wang.
Honestly, we can see it: The brooding eyes, the goofy smile, and the outward displays of affection for Grande scream confidence. BDE for sure.
As happy as we are for Ariana Grande (get it, literally), we can’t help but consider some of the issues that arise when your partner is well-endowed. We all hear that having a big penis is this “great thing,” but there are concerns, ones we’re not encouraged to talk about. You should feel lucky, right? Right?!
Is your guy blessed with a giant peen in the bedroom? Maybe a little too blessed? Yeah, lady. It’s a thing. You’re not weird. We have your back (and your front).
Here is what to do if your partner’s penis is too big.
Warm up for at least 20 minutes
Bigger isn't always better. We’ve been so culturally conditioned to “want” a big penis that when we have one, we tend to rush to get it inside of us. This is objectively not a great idea. The penis isn’t going anywhere. There is plenty of huge peen to go around during this sex session. If you push it, you’re going to end up with discomfort or pain. Ouch.
Take time to warm up your body. We mean really, really warm up. Your vagina naturally lubricates and expands when you’re turned on. This can take several minutes for most women. Devote at least 20 minutes to foreplay. Have your partner use their mouth or a toy. If possible, wait until you have an orgasm before moving onto other play.
Remember, penetration is not the “grand finale” of sex. It is just a part of the whole sexual experience. You can have a big dick and not throw it up inside of you at a moment’s notice. You can have fulfilling sexual play that *gasp* doesn’t even include penetration at all. BDE is a frame of mind. Use it.
Take penetration slowly
Now, there is no such thing as “too big.” Vaginas can expand to over two-hundred percent when aroused and much, much more to accommodate the head of an infant. You need to pay attention to what is happening during sexual play and take the time to match your body to your mind.
When you feel ready for penetration, take it slow and easy. Communicate with your partner. Have him start with the tip and inch in with caution. No slamming his penis into you—that will hurt.
Listen to what your body is telling you. Does it feel good? Is there pain? If anything feels uncomfortable, do something else for a few minutes to better prepare. If it feels good, encourage your partner to keep going. Start with slow thrusts and pick up the pace as you see fit.
You are a human being with a real, human body. You aren’t a porn star who is expected to play the role of “Giant Penis Loving Blonde.” Relax into your body and breathe.
Lots and lots of lube (forever and always)
How much lube should you use? In proportion to the amount Pete Davidson loves Ariana Grande. I.e. A lot.
Get yourself a reliable personal lubricant that you trust to get you through. When in doubt, go for a water-based lubricant like Unbound Jelly or Good Clean Love. Check the label and make sure the lube is paraben, petro-chemical, and glycerin-free.
Lube is BAE. It provides a barrier against friction and makes sex so much more comfortable. While we suggest lube for every person, regardless of their partner’s penis size, this is especially important when your partner is well-endowed.
Be sure your apply lube to both your vulva, vagina, and your partner’s penis. The wetter the better. You can be essentially swimming in lube and still need more.
Ariana, we're praying for you girl 🙏🏻.