Is It Ever OK to Invite an Ex to Your Wedding?

Even if you're on good terms now, it's still a delicate situation

Updated 01/02/17

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While you may not want to think about it, it’s pretty likely that both you and your fiancé dated other people in the past. In fact, one (or both!) of you might be lucky enough to have one of those past relationships where the breakup was totally amicable and now you’re great friends. But no matter how friendly you are, is it ever okay to invite your ex to your wedding? Here’s what our experts have to say.

Before you send the official invitation, sit down with your fiancé and talk about it. You may be friends with your ex, but if it makes your spouse-to-be uncomfortable, remember that your marriage is much more important. After all, neither of you wants to be distracted from the magic of your wedding day by the presence of someone from your partner’s past!

Be cautious of any lingering feelings, too. You may have moved on (you are about to walk down the aisle!), but if you've ever gotten the vibe that your former flame wishes he'd never let you go, nix him from the wedding guest list STAT. Don't invite unwanted drama to your wedding — and don't give a former love who hasn't moved on the chance to object during your vows.

If you and your fiancé do decide that an ex will make the wedding guest list, it may be worthwhile to ensure everyone has met one another before the wedding way to avoid any extra tension. Then, when your big day arrives, treat your guest as you would any other guest. Seat them with mutual friends (if your BFFs are no longer harboring hard feelings) or with a group of cousins or other age-appropriate guests your ex will get along with fairly well. Greet them warmly and thank them for coming, then turn your focus back to your new hubby and hit the dance floor!

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