The Essential Wedding Email Etiquette Guide

All the answers to your prenuptial correspondence questions

Updated 09/04/19

Weddings have gotten decidedly digital, from live-streaming vows and toasts from friends via Skype and FaceTime to custom wedding hashtags and Snapchat filters. But when it comes to email and your wedding, things get a little more tricky. Yes, using email instead of heading to the post office can majorly slash your budget (and save you precious time), but that doesn’t mean you should always hit “send” instead of stamping the envelope. Our experts have a few suggestions for when to log in to your inbox as well as when snail mail is really the way to go.

Can We Email Our Save-the-Dates?

Yes! This is one of the pieces of wedding-related mail that can definitely go out digitally. Once you’ve pinned down the date (and started on your wedding website), grab an engagement photo (or just a photo of the two of you that you both love) and email your family and friends to let them know when the big event will be. This could be a formal evite or could be a quick note asking your VIPs to make sure they’re available on your chosen weekend.

What About Our Invitations?

When it comes to your wedding invitation, it’s paper all the way. Is it a little old-school? Yes. But paper invitations are a time-honored formality that guests really appreciate and notice—and often save as mementos. Plus, this is a great way to showcase your personality and style with little customizable details.

Can We Provide an E-mail Address for RSVPs?

Yes! You may want to still use a printed RSVP card for guests who are less tech savvy, but you can definitely put an email address (or even a URL) where guests can RSVP digitally on your invitation insert. Look for a wedding website platform that supports digital RSVPs. You should be able to upload your guest list, which will serve as a password of sorts to make sure your guests are RSVP-ing for only the people who are invited, and it should easily export responses into a spreadsheet for instant tracking.

Do We Have to Mail Printed Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party Invites?

Emailing your wedding invitations is generally frowned upon, but that rule doesn’t apply to all of your wedding events. An evite is a great, affordable option for an engagement party, bridal shower, or bachelorette weekend. These events often have much smaller guest lists, which can end up being more expensive than if you were mailing them to a crowd. Digital invites often also have ways your guests can communicate with one another to coordinate travel or RSVP quickly, helping keep your hosts and hostesses extra organized.

Can We E-mail Our Guests with Travel, Lodging, and Activity Information After the Invites Go Out?

You bet! Sending an informational email instead of printing a card will help keep the details at your guests’ fingertips, as well as reduce the weight of your mailed invitations (which will save you $$$ on postage!). Summarize the travel and lodging options that are on your wedding website, include recommendations for activities and restaurants, and don’t forget to link to your wedding site so guests can find even more!

What About Our Registry Information?

While it might be tempting to send an email with links to wherever you’ve registered, don’t do it! Much like printed invitations, it’s poor form to send your guests a link to a site where they can buy you gifts, and registry information should never come directly from the couple. Instead, make sure your registry information is clearly marked on your wedding website, and let your parents and wedding party know where you’re registered.

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