When someone else is footing the bill for your wedding, you have to navigate the space between planning the wedding you really want and respecting the person who is writing the checks. Many parents opt to be involved in the budgeting process to have a better sense of where the money is going, but what’s a bride to do if her parents aren’t on board with how she has prioritized the funds? Our experts weigh in.
If your parents aren’t thrilled with the way you’ve planned to spend your wedding budget, begin by having an open dialogue about what you’re thinking. Walk them through the details and reasons behind your decision, as well as any logistical specifics that might have caused you to put more money in one place than another. They might think your tent budget is way too high until they realize you’re putting down flooring because the ground is uneven, or may wonder why you’ve slashed the floral budget in favor of catering until they know you still have a plan for covering the tables. Get everyone on the same page, then address any lingering concerns about your wedding budget.
Do you have your heart set on a splurge item, like a photo booth or custom pillows for the lounge area, when your parents think you could use the money more wisely? Hear them out. Yes, times have changed since they got married, but since they’re paying for it, they do have some say in where the money goes. This is especially true if they think you’re overlooking something more necessary (like an extra bartender to keep lines down) in favor of a detail guests may not notice.
Still not sure how to proceed? Work to find a compromise. Make your case for why the budget you’ve proposed will help you achieve the wedding of your dreams, and hear your parents out. Find ways to move some of the money around, whether that means opting for less expensive linens and more simple china or downsizing the band from 12 pieces to eight. After all, you want your parents to have a fabulous time, too!