Being the best man can feel like you’re responsible for being the life of the party, making sure the entire crew of wedding guests are having the time of their lives, and, of course, being there for the groom when he needs a pump-up session or just a few seconds to chill out. But being a best man comes with a lot of extra responsibilities and emotions that people hardly talk about. The nerves that go into writing and giving a best man speech are enough to make you glare at a blank piece of paper for months before piecing together your toast. Having to research bachelor party locations and activities can make you feel like you signed up for a second full-time job. Making sure you keep the wedding bands near and dear to your pockets before the ceremony might seem like an easy task but often it’s just another thing to forget about.
Read on to relate to six tweets that get real about what it’s like to take on the role of being the best man.
1. Writing a Hilarious Speech is Extra Hard
Nobody will believe you’ve spent hours eyeballing a piece of paper, thinking of the best kind of jokes to incorporate, the most heartfelt moments to recall, and the well wishes you have for the couple when you find yourself with a blank piece of paper and a speech that’s hardly been written. When writer’s block is hitting you hard, just get started by outlining speech ideas and jotting down all that you think you want to say. You can wordsmith it later on.
2. You Want to Make a Scene Without Making the Bride Mad
As the best man, you want to make sure your friend has the best night of his life. You want to be the party starter on the dance floor, the one at the open bar organizing the group fireball shots, and the one who is making sure the guests are having fun. Just make sure your attempts at being the life of the party don’t make the bride mad, offended, or overwhelmed.
3. Figuring Out What to Say & What Not to Say
When it comes to giving a speech, greeting guests, or even complimenting the bride, it’s important to have guidelines as to what is OK to say and what you should keep hush hush. Whether it’s the groom’s second wedding (and your second time being a best man) or you don’t fancy the bride all that much, save the drama or the negative comments for another night.
4. Learning How to Be a Best Man Takes Practice
Think being a best man is just planning a wild bachelor party and putting on a tuxedo? There’s more on your to-do list than you think. You’ll be in charge of holding onto the rings, keeping the groom calm, and pinning the boutonnieres on yourself and the groomsmen—which might require some pre-wedding tutorials.
5. Controlling Your Nerves Can Be Tough
On the day of the wedding, you might feel like you’re a ball of nerves, acting as if it is your own wedding day. It’s not. But it is your greatest pals big day and so you might take on the tension, the nerves, and the stress that he feels and find yourself pacing back and forth until the open bar finally starts serving drinks.