The minute before he proposed is fuzzy and vague, just regular life. But the moment he unexpectedly got down on one knee — BOOM! — you were blasted into hyper-reality. You can remember every atmospheric detail (that waterfall behind you is really loud), every emotion (excited-HAPPY-scared-awe-glee-fear) and every random person, place or thing that entered your consciousness at that exact moment (What are my DAD and my awful ex-boyfriend in my mind right now? Seriously???).
Why is this all even happening? It's happening because in that life-changing moment of being proposed to, your brain recorded much more sensory information than normal. Your brain was in hyper-memory mode: taking in, processing and storing sights, sounds, feelings and smells in minutiae, which makes it feel as if time slowed down. During this important moment in your life, the tiny details that usually pass in and out of your brain — such as that really loud waterfall — are forever captured, vividly, in your memory.
When else do we experience hyper-reality and time slowing down? During traumatic, life-changing events.
So, does that mean that your marriage proposal was a traumatic event? In a certain way, yes, but not necessarily in a negative way. Before the proposal, you were just boyfriend and girlfriend. Immediately after, the process of becoming a wife, a family and maybe one day a mother has been initiated. In that moment of your love on bended knee, you are, in an instant, forever changed. It’s safe to call that a trauma — albeit a good trauma — to your sense of identity.
What went on during your proposal, exactly? What do you remember of the atmosphere, the light, the temperature, the vibe? What do you remember about your experience — your state of mind, your thought process, your emotional journey, your random thoughts? What do you remember about your fiancé — his emotional state, the look on his face, the words he said? What do you remember saying to him (we’ll assume it was a “yes”) in return? What do you remember it feeling like right after?
Take a moment, right now, to write these memories down. Be specific and thorough. Capture the entire event — what happened on the outside as well as your rollercoaster of emotions. Make note of even the smallest details now because over time, even hyper-memory looses some of its clarity. Now’s the time to record this special memory so that will last forever. Write it down while it’s still fresh in your heart and mind.