Overwhelmed by the thought of gathering 200 of your “nearest and dearest” together for your wedding day? Eloping may have crossed your mind, but that’s not the only way to avoid the crowd. Instead, have all the fixings of a wedding, but on a much smaller scale. We’re talking 10 guests, 20 max (your actual nearest and dearest), and all of the things that will make your wedding feel like, you know, your wedding: invitations, dinner, a memorable ensemble, cake, and any other detail important to the two of you.
Shrinking the event down to a cozy, intimate size guarantees you’ll love where your money goes, and it creates the opportunity for great memories with every single guest. But there’s more to it than decreasing your guest list. There are planning changes to make, details to consider, and (hooray!) a proportionally larger budget to work with.
Ahead, we've rounded up 30 wedding planner-approved small wedding ideas to consider for your big day.
Strategically Plan Your Guest List
A small wedding is only so if the guest list is as small as possible. “Look through your text messages and calls, and only invite those you’ve spoken to within the last three months,” says Jove Meyer of Jove Meyer Events. “We speak to those who matter most—it’s that simple.” If you're having a hard time narrowing down your guest list, consider if you would take this person out for a several hundred-dollar dinner or have them as a guest in your home for the weekend. "Thinking about how close your relationships are will help ensure you are truly comfortable with those you surround yourselves with on your wedding day,” note Aleah and Nick Valley of Valley & Company Events.
Mail Handwritten Invitations
With fewer guests on your list, it's much easier to send handwritten invitations with beautiful hand lettering, rather than printing hundreds. Or, you might even skip the formal invitations and opt to call each of your guests instead.
Send a Wedding Announcement
Of course, everybody will want to know that you've tied the knot. For those who were not included on your small guest list, consider sending a wedding announcement or handwritten note. “Make a list of those who will want to know the big news, and send out a wedding announcement after the fact,” suggests Luke Wilson of Luke Wilson Events.
Consider a Restaurant Venue
Fewer people on the guest list means the world is your oyster when it comes to choosing a nontraditional venue, and a restaurant may be the perfect fit. “They're unique spaces that have everything you need in one place,” Meyer says. Consider a spot that you and your partner love to frequent. Just be sure you love everything about it, from the style and the menu to the existing décor, as restaurants often have restrictions on decorations.
Host at the Family Home
Consider using the backyard of your family house for a cozy venue. “Family homes can pose many challenges for events with a large guest list, but work well with a smaller group,” Wilson says. “I love the sentiment of having an intimate affair in a place that is meaningful to the couple.”
Choose an Airbnb
Choosing an Airbnb venue may be the perfect fit for your needs. Tiffany Rivera of Simply Breathe Events suggests looking into beautiful private homes (that aren’t your own), which give you the flexibility to move between spaces and make your wedding day really cost-efficient.
Be sure to check with the host of your preferred Airbnb before booking. Some properties do not allow gatherings such as weddings.
Find a Small Space in a Large Venue
Traditional venues are full of unexpected spaces that are perfect for smaller celebrations. “Consider areas that are often overlooked, like the library of a large historic estate,” says Francie Dorman of 42 North. Courtyards, theaters, or smaller galleries are also great options.
Get Creative With Seating Arrangements
If you're planning a smaller wedding in a large venue, it may be time to get creative with ceremony and reception seating arrangements. “Making a large space feel intimate can be so fun, as you have the opportunity to get really creative with seating and table layouts, as well as adding things like a lounge or creative bars and food stations,” Meyer says. “Consider an extra-large round table for 20 to fill more space, or mix up how the venue is usually used by having the ceremony where others might have dinner and vice versa."
Gift a Welcome Box
Whether you're hosting a destination wedding, a weekend-long celebration, or an intimate evening party, a welcome box is such a personalized touch to put together for your small guest list. Incorporate items that you and your partner love or bring in influences from your wedding's locale.
Hire a Day-Of Coordinator
Wedding planners or day-of coordinators aren't just for large weddings. “It’s also a great idea to hire a wedding planner, even if it’s only for day-of coordination,” Rivera says. “You’ll want someone there to facilitate the flow of the day so you can enjoy it instead of worrying about whether alcohol is running low.”
Be Thoughtful With Activities
As you’re determining the details and activities, decide what is important to you and your partner and skip the things that don’t matter. “Many couples opt to forgo some of the traditional dancing at a small wedding,” note Nick and Aleah Valley. “Know your crowd and replace it with an activity everyone will enjoy, or keep it in the timeline if your loved ones love to dance.”
Hire a Live Band
If you do love dancing, you may want to splurge on a live band, but be sure to keep the band’s size in mind. “If your band has an equal number of players to your final guest count, it will feel really overpowering. Instead, hire a smaller group of musicians so you can have the formality of special dances without a crowd on stage,” Wilson advises.
Invest in Your Photographer
A fantastic photographer is a great investment, no matter how many guests will be in attendance, but a smaller guest list may mean more opportunities to capture sentimental moments. “With fewer people at the table, your guests will really relax, creating an intimate atmosphere,” Dorman explains. “Hire a trusted photographer who will capture the laughter, the tears, and the clinking glasses, since those are the moments you’ll treasure most.”
Elevate Your Escort Card Display
Creating an elaborate escort display is such a fun way to include guests in your big day. "Go hyper-custom," says Meyer. Opt for an escort display with handwritten touches or even items that double as a favor.
Create a Lounge Area
Think about ways to keep your guests interacting with one another. “Guests will be sitting to catch up instead of cutting a rug, so create a lounge area where everyone can relax after dinner,” Wilson says. This is a great space to host a cocktail hour as well.
Splurge on Dinner
If you're not feeding a huge crowd, you have more room for a detailed menu. Whether you're wishing for a seven-course meal with expert wine pairings, an elaborate buffet, or a fun food truck on-site, the options are infinite with a smaller wedding. “With a small group, you can really personalize every detail of the menu,” says Meyer.
Opt for a Long Estate Table
A long reception table can be such a fun way to make everyone feel included. If you have a smaller group, it's easier to say goodbye to traditional round tables spread throughout the room. "This will make everyone feel like family," says Wilson.
Consider a U-Shaped Table
Depending on your space, setting up a U-shaped table may be the best way to facilitate dinner conversation. This is a great way to work within a space, while still making guests feel connected.
Play With Place Settings
Design a really beautiful place setting for each guest if you're hosting a seated dinner. This is such a great opportunity to go all out with a stunning setup. But you'll want to be sure they have the basics, too. “Make sure your guests have enough elbow room at their place settings and easy access to the essentials (water, wine, and flatware),” advise Nick and Aleah Valley.
Personalize Place Cards
Place cards offer so much opportunity for customization, and with a smaller guest list there are fewer to make or buy. Opt for a personalized touch with calligraphed place cards for each guest. Make them even more special by writing on something that ties into the theme of your wedding.
Go Bold With Plenty of Florals
You may find that you have more room in your floral budget than you thought. Why not go big with statement arrangements? Nick and Aleah Valley suggest covering the table in an abundance of low, ultra-lush flowers and candles for a vibrant display.
Utilize Table Linens
Don't be afraid to go all out with a stunning tablescape. Adding elements such as bold table linens and intentional glassware can provide a more anchored, intimate feel.
Consider Hanging Arrangements
A smaller wedding may mean more opportunities for guests to chat and connect, and you'll want to leave room on the table for conversation. Britt Cole, also of 42 North, suggests lifting the flowers up and installing an overhead arrangement of florals, moss, and soft lighting. This can also help a larger room feel more cozy.
Use Handwritten Menus
If you're hoping to add a special handwritten touch to your tablescape for dinner, doing menus on your own is a beautiful idea. With fewer guests, there won't be as many to write.
Add Sweet Touches
Who says you can't add hand-painted touches just because? Little embellishments like personalized macarons will make each and every guest feel so special.
Plan a Smaller Cake
With fewer guests, you'll need less cake. But that doesn't mean you can't have the dessert of your dreams. Chat with your baker about sticking with the tiered approach if that's what you love. Your baker may be able to accommodate with smaller cake rounds while keeping the same traditional wedding cake look intact.
Incorporate Family Heirlooms
Peppering in small, memorable touches is much simpler in a more petite space with fewer guests. Consider incorporating family heirlooms such as vintage china or silver to make the day that much more sentimental.
If fewer guests means freeing up more of your budget for additional details, then why not make it count? Including items like a custom cocktail napkin is a cute way to showcase what you and your partner love as a couple.