While many disastrous scenarios inevitably run through your mind before the big day arrives, one of these is probably not someone objecting to you and your fiancé's union. But thanks to a recent thread on Reddit, it seems that what we long thought of as a rhetorical question isn't so rhetorical after all. At least, not according to these people.
On the Ask Reddit page, OneInAZillion asked the community this question: "Redditors who have objected at weddings or seen someone object, what happened in the next 5 minutes?" Surprisingly, a good number of people had a harrowing story to tell. But before you read on and get worked up by the (slim) possibility that this may happen on your own wedding day, keep this professional's comment in mind. "As a measurement as to how often this happens: I work weddings and have attending somewhere north of 300 weddings," Star_Tropic wrote on the thread. "I have never seen nor heard of this happening at any event I have worked. Nor have I heard of other industry professionals that I'm in contact with experience it."
Now that you're feeling calmer, here are a few of the most cringeworthy stories we found.
"When the pastor got to the part 'or forever hold your peace,' the bride said, 'Yes, I'd like to say something.' Then she turned around to her guests and said, 'I'd like to thank my maid of honor for sleeping with my fiancé last night.' With that, she threw her bouquet and stormed off. The story even made it on the radio at the time." -PTSDPillowGuy
"I was a waiter for a venue that had a lot of weddings. We typically watched the wedding ourselves from the second floor and waited for everyone to come up for the reception. A guest for the wedding arrived a few hours early, so he sat in the restaurant and had a few too many drinks. He yelled, 'DON'T F*CKING DO IT (bride's name here). HE'S AN A**HOLE.' There was the typical gasp by the crowd, then it was just silence as people from the bar escorted him out." -ParoxysmAttack
"I was at a college buddy's wedding when a drunken childhood friend of the bride tried to stand up and profess his love for her. The bride's father immediately stood up and tried to haul off said drunken guy by the ear, except he was so pissed he pulled too hard and partially severed the guy's ear... The dude screamed like a small girl [and] a few people even applauded." -ilickvarts
"My friend's older brother is a lawyer. He was marrying a lawyer. Most of their friends are lawyers. The officiant was a judge who was a friend of theirs. He and his fiancé thought it would be funny to plant someone in the audience. They got a friend to yell "I Object!" to which the judge yelled "Overruled!" It seemed to have gone over well for most but I don't think some of their family members got it." -suitology
"My dad marrying his third wife. My step brother and I were in the wedding party. He was about 6, I was 10. The preacher asks if anyone objects and my brother raises his hand so very politely. My dad asks why, and my step brother replies, 'because I want you to promise to take me fishing whenever I want, first.' " -Southern_Kisses
"This happened at one of my friend's sibling's weddings. Her parents are super conservative and hadn't gotten the chance to know the daughter's fiancé very well before they got married. In their minds all that was relevant about him was that he was 10 years older than her and had previously divorced. They had made subtle comments here and there before the wedding that they weren't happy about it. It should have been a forewarning of what was to come. The day of the wedding, everything was beautiful. Friend's sister and her fiancé were ecstatic to be getting married and invited friends and family from both sides to their outdoor wedding. All was going well, until the preacher asks the audience if anyone has objections to why they should get married. And as serious as can be, dad of the bride stands up and says 'Her mother and I object,' and then after a long hesitation sits back down. Silence. No one can believe that that just happened. Not knowing exactly how to handle it, the preacher just says 'Ok' and finishes the ceremony as planned."