Contrary to popular belief, cold feet aren't the only cause of pre-wedding jitters. In fact, most of the time brides couldn't be more excited to marry their significant others. It's the things that are truly out of their control that often get them the most worked up (think feuding family members!). So if you're feeling uneasy for any of the following reasons, we've got your back, sister.
Your Body Image
Most brides want to look their best on their big day, which can definitely trigger pre-wedding jitters, points out Shafonne Myers, wedding planner and founder of Pretty Pear Bride. "Making sure your dress fits perfectly, that your hair and makeup look amazing, and for some, especially curvy brides, it can be a bit more intense. If you're feeling self-conscious about your body, no matter what your size is, keep in mind that your soon-to-be mate is marrying you for a reason and that's because you look fantastic inside and out."
Whether you're deathly afraid of a downpour on your big day or seriously stressed out about less than perfect temperatures, obsessively checking the weather isn't going to help. If anything, it's just going to make you that much more anxious. So don't look at it, suggests associate planner and event designer at Pure Luxe Bride, Blake Bush. "The weather changes constantly and is a worry you truly can't control. Discuss a rain plan with your planner so you know exactly what will need to be done in advance," she says.
Believe it or not, not every bride (or groom) enjoys being in the spotlight. And for those that are shy or typically avoid having others shower them with attention, the thought of getting hitched can cause a ton of anxiety, notes Greg Jenkins, founder of Bravo Productions. "Breathe and find things that will make you calm going into the day and push ahead," he recommends. "Remember that the people attending your function are there to support your happiness."
Money woes have you feeling frazzled leading up to your big day? Steer clear of any cash-related concerns by setting an initial budget and sticking to it. "Decide what you must have and what you can live without so there aren't any surprise costs when the wedding approaches," advises Bush.
In particular, divorced parents! "As one of my brides put it, way too many members of my family in the same place at once," says Lynn Jawitz, owner of Florisan Wedding and Event Design in NYC. To calm any pre-wedding jitters, she suggests meeting with each of the parties early on in the process and outlining what is to be expected of them in terms of behavior (i.e. whom they will take photos with, whom they will be standing next to, etc.). "This should all be fleshed out well before the day, and an expressed agreement agreed to between all of the parties."
According to Sandy Malone, owner of Weddings in Vieques, the most common cause of pre-wedding jitters is what remains on the bride's to-do list in the month leading up to the wedding. "If she's DIYing her big day, she's going to be freaking out about how much is left to do and whether things will all work out or not. On the other hand, if she's got a planner but hasn't kept up with her deadlines for the guests' dinner orders, the DJ playlist or even writing her vows, these things will cause anxiety that is often misplaced." Malone's solution? Stick to a schedule and get going!
After you've spent an entire year planning your day, sweating the details is hard not to do for so many brides. At some point, however, you've got to let go of control and allow others to take the reins in executing your function, points out Jenkins. "Delegate at the onset of planning your nuptials and reception, knowing you cannot play 'wedding planner' at your own event. And remind yourself that whatever happens is a small glitch in the grand scheme of celebrating life together with your spouse."