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Made a New BFF in the Middle of Wedding Planning? Here’s What to Do.

Don't finalize that guest list just yet.

Olivia Rae James

Finalizing your wedding guest list is one of the toughest to-dos on your list, and getting it done is a huge relief. But being engaged doesn’t always bring your social life to a screeching halt, meaning you might make a fantastic new friend halfway through the planning process. Is it too late to include your new BFF in the festivities? Our experts weigh in.

Hats off to all the brides and grooms in this boat: You’ve managed to balance planning a wedding with not only seeing your friends, but making new ones. Please, teach us your ways!

If you find yourself with a new bestie as your wedding day approaches, you can definitely still include him or her in your celebration. Chances are, they’re now involved in a lot of the details, so hand-delivering an invitation and adding them to the list is totally acceptable (as long as your venue has space and your budget allows). Let them know that you really want them to be there, and do your best to provide enough advanced notice so he or she can book flights and a hotel room in time if needed. The same goes for events like your bachelorette party or bridal shower. If the host or hostess can accommodate one more, feel free to skip the formal invitation in favor of a phone call, e-mail, or in-person invitation. This is one last-minute invite that won’t make anyone feel like a second thought.

There is, of course, a caveat. If the friend in question is someone you’ve been friends with for a long time, but have just recently gotten close with, proceed with caution. If your invitations just went out, stick theirs in the mail ASAP. But if your RSVP deadline is next week? He or she probably knows an invite isn’t in the cards, and rushing to squeeze them in could raise questions about why they weren’t invited in the first place. Make the call on a case-by-case basis. Some friends will be thrilled to be considered, even if it’s a little late, while others might be offended that you hadn’t had them on the list all along.

See more: Should We Send Wedding Invitations to Our Parents and Wedding Party?

No matter how close you are, avoid the temptation of adding this person to your wedding party. If you’ve already chosen your bridesmaids and groomsmen, there are probably a few friends you’ve known for a while who didn’t make the cut. Adding your new BFF would be pouring salt in the wound, so instead find another way to involve him or her if you so choose, from doing a reading at the ceremony to tapping them as the person to help you bustle your dress.

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