In our next installment of the Meditation How-Tos marriage advice series, the Kundalini guide behind Benshen, Desiree Pais, gives you the step-by-step methods you need to practice to stay focused and calm before, during, and after you tie the knot.
When it comes to preparing for your wedding, you may be ambitiously inspired to do a "life overhaul" in order to look and feel your best when the big day comes. Maybe it comes in the form of creating new habits that make you feel better, like working out more and eating less processed foods, but changing patterns can sometimes feel like pushing a boulder up a mountain—the last thing you want to feel when planning a big event. It can create an immense amount of stress; change requires breaking patterns you've been engaging with for a long time. Sometimes the subconscious mind, where patterns and habits come from, doesn’t want to budge and you end up spending more time feeling guilty for not getting to that workout class today instead of feeling incredible from the endorphin release and sweaty glow.
Luckily, Kundalini yoga has a meditation called the Addictions Meditation, which is incredibly powerful for changing habits. With three minutes a day, I was able to quit smoking without even trying. I remember two weeks in, I couldn’t even stand the smell of cigarettes when I would pass someone smoking on the street. By three weeks, I would have a physical gag reflex if I tried to smoke. Many people don’t realize how incredible this is, considering how much energy we spend trying to make change; this meditation helps us make those changes we want without seemingly even trying, except for the three minutes of effort we put into doing the meditation itself.
Simply put, it’s a meditation that helps to break habits that drain you, leading to choices that make you feel good instead. This meditation not only works with breaking physical addictions but also works powerfully on changing patterns of the mind: habitual thoughts about ourselves, resistance to change, low self-worth, and so on.
To learn how to do this meditation, watch this video with one of my favorite Kundalini yoga instructors, Simrit, and read more about the benefits here. Try it for at least three minutes a day for 40 days and see how easy making changes becomes.
Desiree Pais is a meditation and Kundalini-yoga guide and a natural-beauty alchemist. She is currently pursuing a master's degree at Pacific College of Oriental Medicine, and she studied Daoist healing with Grandmaster Sung Baek. She teaches Kundalini yoga and meditation classes and workshops around New York City. She aims to make these ancient methods available to anyone who is interested in using this profound practice to create the life they want to experience.