The prostate is one of the most highly underrated pleasure points in the male body, but it remains one of the most highly stigmatized topics. Why? Engaging the prostate in sex requires a man to allow himself to be anally penetrated, and that can stir up feelings.
Unfortunately, there is a perpetuating and incorrect notion that allowing someone to put something in your butt means you’re either less of a man or would enjoy gay sex. It's ridiculous and homophobic, and the taboo has kept guys from experiencing so much more pleasure than they ever thought possible. All male-bodied people should explore this amazing erogenous zone and find new modes of pleasure through it.
Also known as the male G-spot, this gland has been shown to increase orgasm by a significant margin when stimulated either alone, with penis play, or during intercourse.
It’s time we all embraced this magical wonder and learned more about it. Here is everything you need to know about the prostate and how to massage it.
Where is the prostate?
The prostate is a walnut-sized gland located a few inches inside the anus. Its main function is to create prostate fluid, one of the two main ingredients in semen. If you insert one or two fingers into the anus and reach up toward your partner’s belly button, you should be able to feel the prostate. If you’re unsure, check in with them—when you hit it, they will know.
Why does it feel good? Experts aren’t 100 percent sure. All we know is that it feels really, really amazing.
And massaging a prostate also has health benefits. When you release prostate fluid, you help remove stagnant material which can lead to prosthesis. (So, you’re really just doing something good for your body by getting off.)
How do you massage a prostate?
You can massage it in a variety of ways. The easiest is just to put pressure on it. Insert two fingers, well-lubed, into your partner's rear and make a come-hither motion the same way you would with G-spot stimulation. If you have long fingernails, we definitely suggest trimming them or wearing plastic finger caps before doing this.
You can do this while you stroke your partner’s penis or they stroke it themselves—it will intensify every feeling. Your partner will feel a fullness, an igniting of the nerves around the anal opening, as well as pressure on the prostate. The orgasm that follows might just be the best he’s ever had.
Try using some toys!
Sex toys are definitely not just for women, and there are some excellent prostate massagers on the market. When you use a toy, a lot of the time it will just stay in place, allowing you to do other sex things while your partner’s prostate is naturally stimulated.
Our favorite toy for beginners is the Aneros. It's small and shaped to perfectly reach the prostate. It looks a bit like a knobby finger, the ridges are incredible, and it has two external loops designed to keep the toy perfectly in place. Grease up the toy well with your favorite water- or oil-based lube, and insert the toy gently.
Have your partner insert it himself the first few times so he can get used to the sensation. His anus should be relaxed and he should be breathing deep when putting something inside his butt. (You don’t want him to be tensed up.) You can then move into hand sex, cunnilingus, or intercourse. Whatever you or he likes!
See more: The 7 Best Couples Sex Toys of 2018
With butt plugs and prostate massagers of all kinds, the second ring of sphincter holds it in place. If you’re into vibration, we’re big fans of the b-Vibe Novice Plug to maximize please.
But a fair warning: Never, ever put something up your butt or a partner’s butt that doesn’t have a flared base. Your butt hole is very strong and without something keeping the toy in place, it can get lost. Only used toys designed for the butt in a butt.
While the whole prostate thing might sound a bit out of the box and unconventional, it could really change the game of your sex life. Enjoy!