Every week, we give our readers a glimpse inside the mindset of a guy's brain on weddings with the help of the hilarious and smart editors at The Plunge.
Personally, we find the whole bride-to-be vs. mother-in-law power struggle to be a bit overstated. It's not like we're ever going to actively choose one of you over the other. That's far too much work. We prefer to remain completely aloof to the whole thing while it gets sorted out around us. To ensure we can stay out of it when the time comes, we're letting you know now what will surely keep you in our mother's good graces.
If the whole idea is that this tug of war happens because she knew us first and you take care of us now (and again, we say "if" because we don't buy this as that big a deal), then the simplest move for you is to simply "get" that. Understand where she's coming from and just kind of deal with it. So she's quick to remind you our favorite meal is her homemade lasagna when you know we'd much prefer your "dump everything in the crock pot surprise" every day of the week. Big deal. Suck it up and let her have the moment. You'll win her over by tacitly admitting you'll never win the battle (even while you're mentally targeting her with Jedi mind control rays).
As far as wedding jobs and responsibilities go, mother of the groom is one of the lamest. If you want to make her truly happy, just give our mom something to do. Seriously, anything. She just wants to be involved and feel like you trust her to help. She may be most excited to join you for a dress fitting or help us choose cake (actually, forget that, we get all the cake), but you could have her do the crap that makes you want to stab your eyes out just reading it in your to-do list and she'll crush it. Congratulations, you've just scored points for the future by having someone do your dirty laundry for you. Like a boss.
Yes, we know, you have your own mother, and thank you for reminding us again. Nobody's asking you to be besties with our mom (admit you love it when we say things like "besties"), but we would highly recommend building some sort of relationship with her outside of us. Things will be leaps and bounds smoother in the future if you can start understanding each other now without requiring us to mediate. This is key. Game's on. We can't be over here mediating.
The single highest-impact tactic you can employ to win our mother's love forever is to pick up the phone and dial her, or convince us to do so. Why? Because we never will. It's not that we don't love our mom (hi, mom!) but we just won't ever call her. Knowing this, and seeing that we now have an awesome everyday companion who has taken over the duties of keeping us warm at night (aww yeah), our mom will start to worry that she's going to lose touch with us forever. That's where, if you ask us, this whole thing starts and ends. So keep the lines of the communication open and let her know she'll continue to remain an important part of our lives. If anything she should rest assured knowing we've found someone else to eventually change our diapers.