If you're the kind of woman who thinks sitting through a football game is cruel form of torture, the impending season may be sending shivers up your spine. But you can survive non-stop tackling, passing, and butt-slapping — on your TV, of course! — in your first year of marriage with this expert guidance from Jane Greer, Ph.D., relationship expert and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship.
"Feeling that he's more into himself and his need to watch the game can lead to you not feeling like the most important thing in his world," admits Greer, nailing down the main bone new wives have to pick with the sport. But "the fact is, if you can acknowledge and appreciate how important this game and team is to him, and give him the space to enjoy the game by balancing it with other plans and together time you'll share with him, it won't feel like a loss.
Challenge yourself to see each game the way he sees it and allow him to enjoy it without you and instead of mourning a loss, you'll celebrate and negotiate a compromise — a key to a successful marriage. "For example, he'll go watch the game one day, but another day he'll go bike riding or hiking with you," suggests Greer. "He can plan together time with you that you can look forward to."
If you're up for it, you can also "get into it with him as much as you can," Greer says, a move your husband will surely appreciate. "You may learn a little bit about it or become interested in some of the players. You may find some aspect — maybe something as simple as the food — that you enjoy participating in." But if not, make sure you've got plans for yourself so that his TV-centric attention doesn't breed resentment or cause you to feel abandoned in your marriage, Greer says.