*The tradition of sporting something old, new, borrowed, and blue is wedding gospel, but not all brides love with the "something old" their family members offer them for the big day. So what is a bride to do when her grandmother's heirloom looks more drab than fab? Our etiquette experts weigh in on how to handle a loved one's offered vintage item that doesn't fit with your wedding vision. *
In the pursuit of pleasing your family and avoiding an unpleasant confrontation, you might want to accept your grandmother's kind gesture and sport her "something old" on the big day. If it truly means a great deal to her that you wear the aged item, pleasing her may make you happier in the long run than rejecting her gift. You can also try to subtly incorporate the piece into your ensemble so that it doesn't completely overtake the look. For instance, if the heirloom is a brooch, clip the piece to the back of your bouquet or fasten it to secure your sash.
You can also use less-than-aesthetically-pleasing item to adorn the back of an updo, shoe, or bag. While it may not be your personal taste you should strongly consider appeasing your grandmother — especially if it's something very significant to her. If, and only if, you sense your grandmother's offer is merely a formality should you politely decline while expressing your gratitude.