Narrowing down your wedding guest list of family and friends can be overwhelming and sometimes, seemingly impossible! But when coworkers are thrown in the mix, things are bound to get even more murky and confusing. Fear not! There are many different ways to navigate this sticky situation so that you and your fiancé can get back to the fun parts of the planning process (and also stay sane.)
The "Real" Friend Rule
One way to determine which coworkers will receive an invitation to your big day is to ask yourself, are they my "real" friend? Do you spend time together out of the office, and on weekends? Do they know or have they met your fiancé or your family? If you had a crystal ball, would you see yourselves as friends should you leave your job? Of course everyone would invite everyone they care about in their lives to their weddings, but it just isn't feasible. If you have to make some cuts, asking yourself these questions may help you decide how to proceed.
The All or Nothing Approach
Some people that work in smaller teams or offices find it difficult to make cuts that would only leave one or two coworkers out. While we can't stress enough that your wedding guest list should reflect those closest to you in your personal lives, many engaged couples find it easy to follow the all or nothing approach — meaning inviting either everybody in your office, or nobody. Additionally, if you're cordial and friendly with everyone at work, but nobody really classifies as a friend, don't feel obligated to have any coworkers attend your nuptials. It's perfectly okay to leave work at work.
What About Bosses?
Depending on your work culture and structure, as well as your relationship with your supervisors, some employees feel it's appropriate to extend an invitation to your direct bosses and/or supervisors. While this is a personal decision, it largely depends on your unique situation. Our recommendation would be to follow the lead of others if you're uncertain. How have your coworkers handled this? If you respect them and their decision, it's perfectly fine to do the same. Whatever you do, don't base an invitation on unrealistic ideas of personal gain or professional repercussions. Remember your wedding is personal — it's an intimate day to share with those closest to you. If thinking of your boss' attendance gives you anxiety or apprehension, don't do it!
See More: Who Does (and Doesn't) Get a Plus-One?
Whichever approach you choose to take, remember that your wedding day is about (and only about) you and your fiancé. You can be respectful and considerate without losing sight of this, so try not to get too caught up in pleasing everyone and avoiding hurt feelings. Be direct and open if your wedding guest list becomes a topic of conversation (it shouldn't, but it might) and know that this is just a small bump in the road of wedding planning that most people have encountered before — and everyone has survived.