Quite a few viral bridal stories have made us scratch our heads lately. There was the bride enforcing a $1,000 dress code, and the vegan bride who tried to ban meat-eating guests. And now, a bride is asking guests to pay to attend her wedding.
The bride’s future sister-in-law posted to Netmums.com to share the situation and get some feedback. “So my sister-in-law announced that her wedding (this summer) was going to be a weekend-long affair a couple of hours away from where we live,” she began.
So far, so good—we love a wedding weekend. But the post quickly took a turn.
“Invitations recently went out, and my husband and I were a little shocked to see that alongside RSVP info was bank details to pay £180 to secure our place at the wedding!” she said. “We will be staying over with our child on the venue grounds for 2 nights so I understand what this money will probably go towards this but I just feel it's a bit 'off' and bad etiquette. When we got married, immediate family stayed at the venue which we paid for.”
Yikes. Forcing your guests to pay £180 (approximately $233) instead of making it optional or suggesting other accommodations is pretty steep, considering they will also have to pay for travel and a gift. While weddings do get expensive, the post then went on to reveal the bride’s mom was already paying for the wedding!
“My MIL was shocked as she is footing a lot of the wedding bill and when SIL sounded her out in this, she asked SIL not to ask for money off immediate family in this way,” she said.
In a comment, the shocked invitee clarified that the venue is a country house rented out entirely for two days, meaning the mother-in-law has already paid for the rooms as part of hiring the venue. Since this $233 is not actually covering accommodations for guests, it’s unclear what the guests' money is going toward.
This saint of a sister-in-law said they would pay the price anyway and “wouldn't want to miss [the wedding] for the world. Several commenters did not take the situation as in stride as the original poster.
“I think it's incredibly bad manners,” one commenter wrote. “ It sounds like a business arrangement rather than a wedding. If I was you, I wouldn't go, out of principle as much as anything else.”
Another agreed, writing, “If it's not for accommodation then I'd ask what it's for. If it's other wedding costs then I wouldn't pay it as it's just rude.”
Others thought the request wasn’t that crazy. “I don’t think it’s rude to ask people to pay the going rate for their accommodation if they’re staying in the venue, even if it’s an exclusive use type of venue,” they wrote. “But it should be optional.”
Hopefully the rest of this bride's guests are as generous as the sister-in-law and pay to attend what will hopefully be the best wedding of their lives.