What to Do if the Best Man Backs Out of Giving His Toast

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The best man's toast is a time-honored wedding tradition guaranteed to inspire both fits of laughter and/or tears in your guests. But what is a couple to do when their best man isn't up to the task—and another groomsman is impatiently waiting in the wings to take on the responsibility? We take a look at what to do if this ends up being the case.

Recognize That Speech Giving Isn't for Everyone

Though the best man is customarily responsible for entertaining wedding guests with an endearing and amusing wedding toast, speech giving is not a skill possessed by everyone. Your groom's best man may well have a logical reason for wishing to remain mum, whether it be a deep-seated phobia of public speaking or the knowledge that he expresses himself best through the written word.

Sometimes Bucking Tradition Is Best

The best course of action is to buck tradition and allow the best man to communicate his celebratory sentiments in an alternative format. There are plenty of ways to honor your best man, and for him to honor you, whether he'd rather speak at the rehearsal dinner, or lead a dance during the reception. It's not written in stone that he has to get up in front of all your guests and deliver the perfect humorous-yet-heartfelt speech.

If Someone Else Wants to Step Up, Let Them

Even better, if you have an engaging understudy eagerly waiting to be recruited for the position, you should go for it. By nominating a different groomsman to the post of speech-giver, you can guarantee a solution that pleases all parties, from the guests to the groom. This way, the best man can relax and ensure the groom has a good time, without dreading the clink of a glass.

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