How to Get Over Someone You Love

It takes time and intentional action.

Sad girl.
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Having to get over someone you love can feel quite challenging and even overwhelming, especially if you were blindsided by a breakup. After all, when you care about a person so deeply, it can be heart-wrenching to move past these feelings and get on with your life. Fortunately, there are proven ways to get over someone you love so that you can move forward for good in every sense of the word. Just remember, healing takes time and there's no set pace to hold yourself to.

Read on for the seven key ways to get over someone you love.

1. Accept the Reality of the Situation

The first step in getting over someone you love is to accept the reality of what’s transpired. For instance, when you’re in love with someone who doesn’t love you back, it’s time to make your peace with this kind of unrequited love scenario and stop hoping that things will miraculously change. Once you admit the truth to yourself and decide to accept that this person doesn’t feel the same way about you, then you can make this the turning point and begin the healing process.

2. Rely on Your Support System 

Don't be afraid to reach out to friends, family, or a trained professional for help as you recover from a broken heart. You don’t have to face this difficult love situation alone, and having people in your life who have your best interest at heart can be an integral part of moving on and letting go. Allow yourself to seek out help and be open to receiving it. When you surround yourself with people who have your back and want only the very best for you, you can get out of that funk and recognize that you have a lot to be thankful for. The rewards are twofold as this also helps strengthen those non-romantic relationships.

3. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

When you’re trying to get over someone you love, one of the best steps is to push yourself in different ways and try new activities. If you’ve always wanted to learn how to salsa dance, take a cooking class, or join a kickball league, seize this opportunity to get involved in those new pastimes and even make new friends. Not only are you opening yourself up to having some fun and meeting interesting people, you’re also proving to yourself that life goes on even after this person is no longer part of it. So, embrace the growing pains and stretch those confining limits you've placed upon yourself.

4. Don’t Be Your Own Worst Enemy

People getting over a breakup often blame themselves for being in this position in the first place. But you should always treat yourself with love, care, and respect—especially during this fragile time. (Love yourself the way you'd want your future partner to love you!) Some find themselves feeling as though they’ll never know love again—but this simply isn’t true. Getting over someone means that you’re making space in your heart for a person who will actually deserve to be there. It's okay to acknowledge the significance of this past relationship in your life as well as your needs for love and affection. Viewing the situation from this perspective can be helpful in assessing what those needs and deal-breakers are in future romantic relationships.

Journaling on these points can help you not only better know yourself but also provide clarity as you move forward with new relationships.

5. Look Toward the Future

In order to get over someone you love and move past a breakup that seemed to come out of nowhere, it’s imperative that you look forward rather than backward. If you’re mentally replaying every moment and dissecting all of your conversations to see where things went awry, you’re never going to get over this person because you’re still living in the past. However, if you choose to look forward and focus your energy on what lies ahead, then getting over this person will be that much more doable because you're not constantly dwelling on what previously transpired. Healing takes time, but it also takes space. Allow yourself enough distance from the past to grow into this new chapter of your life.

6. Take a Break From Social Media

How often do you look at this person's social media posts? If you truly want to get over them, it’s time to stop checking their posts, pictures, and tweets. After all, if you're still consumed by what this person is up to and what they do each day, you’re making it that much harder to move on and find someone new. In order to get this person off your mind, it’s essential that they're off your screen.

7. Clear Out the Physical Reminders

A necessary step in moving on is removing the lingering reminders that still surround you. If there are still pictures of your ex in your apartment or your room is full of knickknacks and random items from them, they still maintain a presence in your life. When you're ready to finally get over them, clean up and clear out your personal space to make room for special mementos and memories with someone new.

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