Wedding Party Etiquette and Advice
Our etiquette experts answer all of your questions.
Q: Are there any age limitations for ring bearers and flowers girls?
Q: I have one too many bridesmaids. How can I work the extra friend into my wedding?
Q: One of my bridesmaids doesn't seem enthusiastic about my wedding. Should I ask her to quit the party?
Q: I wanted to ask five of my good friends to be bridesmaids, but my fiancé says that's way too many. Now, so as to avoid hurting anyone's feelings, I'm thinking about not having any attendants at all. Does that make sense to you?
Q: At least half of my attendants are from out of town. Am I supposed to pay for their hotel rooms? What about all of the dresses?
Q: What does the wedding party actually do?
Q: Is it all right to have two maids of honor?
Q: We're having an adults-only reception. Can I still have my friend's daughter be a flower girl?
Q: One of my bridesmaids is pregnant and wants to bow out. What should I do?
Q: Do I need to ask my fiancé's sisters to be bridesmaids? Should he invite my brothers to be groomsmen?
Q: Do I have to ask my sister to be my maid of honor?
Q: My fiancé has a daughter from a previous marriage. He wants her to be a flower girl, which is fine. But he keeps trying to make her the center of attention. Now he wants her to join us at the sweetheart table. I know we're a family, but am I wrong to want the spotlight for just us?
Q: Do I have to have my fiancé's close female friend as one of my bridesmaids?
Q: How old should a flower girl be?
Q: My MOH lives far away but the rest of my bridesmaids are nearby. Should I ask one them to take her place?
Q: My best friend's a guy. Can I have him stand up on my side of the wedding party?
Q: Will a lopsided wedding party look weird?
Q: I want my bridesmaids to look as uniform as possible, including the type of makeup they wear, and they're giving me grief about it. Am I being unreasonable?
Q: Do I have to ask an old friend to be in my bridal party just because I was in hers five years ago?
Q: The best man is super-shy and is really dreading giving the toast. Can he just skip it?
Q: What's a better groomsman's gift—cuff links (my choice) or a bottle of tequila (my fiancé's pick)? I think giving booze is juvenile.
Q: I've heard that one of my bridesmaids has been saying nasty things behind my back—she's criticized the flowers, the food and even the minister! Can I fire her?
Q: Can my mom be my maid of honor?
Q: How can we ensure that the ring bearer behaves during the ceremony?
Q: My guy is equally close to his two friends. Who should be his best man?
Q: Can I ask a groomsman to remove his facial piercings during the ceremony?
Q: Do we have to our attendants gifts?
Q: Can I ask my bridesmaids to cover their tattoos?
Q: How can I include my 12-year-old brother in the wedding party?
Q: Who's supposed to keep the groomsmen informed about appointments?
Q: Can I ask my bridesmaids to alter their appearance?
Q: As the maid-of-honor, am I expected to give a toast at the rehearsal dinner? At the reception? If so, what do I say?
Q: When are you supposed to ask people to be attendants?
Q: One of my bridesmaids has lost interest in the wedding. I had to stalk her to get her dress measurements and even had to put down the deposit because she didn't contact the salon in time. Now she won't return the store's calls about paying the balance and shipping, and she still hasn't booked her flight or hotel for my wedding. What can I do?
Q: I don't think I can afford to be my friend's bridesmaid, but she'll be so hurt if I say no. What do I do?
Q: My best guy friend will be my "maid-of-honor." What are his duties/what does he wear?
Q: My bridesmaid lost her job. What should I do?
Q: I love my cousin, but she's really overweight and I'd rather that she be a reader than wear the supercute bubble dresses that I've chosen for the bridesmaids. My sister thinks I'm being a control freak, but I want my day to be perfect. Who's right?
Q: I'm worried my 'maids don't realize the costs of being in my wedding. What can I do?
Q: What do we do if one of the attendants backs out right before the wedding?
Q: Am I required to have my fiancé's sister as my bridesmaid?
Q: Can I ask my bridesmaid not to change out of her dress after the ceremony?
- Keywords:
- wedding etiquette,
- groomsmen,
- bridesmaids,
- junior bridesmaids,
- ring bearers,
- flower girls
