Q: I would like to invite my large group of coworkers to a shower, but not to the wedding. Can I do that?

A: Not really. Only people invited to the reception are asked to pre-wedding parties (and, by the way, the bride doesn't issue the shower invitations—the party's hostess does that). However, office showers—which are often casual events held right in the workplace—are an exception. If they hold one, your coworkers will probably chip in to get you a group gift, and won't expect to attend the wedding.

See all questions about engagement party, bridal shower, and bachelor(ette) parties etiquette

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