Once you're engaged, you'll want to share the amazing story with everyone you encounter — from your mailman to that lady you sometimes see in the coffee shop. But when it comes to breaking your big news at work, things can get a bit tricky. We enlisted Adrian Granzella Larssen, career expert and editor-in-chief of TheMuse.com, to help explain workplace wedding etiquette.
Open Up About Your Engagement (Within Reason)
"Unless your co-workers rarely talk about their own personal lives, most people will be happy to hear your news," says Granzella Larssen. "That said, not everyone will want to hear about it in detail, so don't co-opt an entire staff meeting or team lunch with your engagement story. Your best bet is to share the news with people one-on-one, starting with your boss and your closest co-workers."
To Invite, or Not to Invite...
"You don't need to invite anyone you don't want to or can't afford, especially if it's a small or destination wedding," she assures. "And the good news is, most people understand that you can't invite all of your co-workers."
Granzella Larssen believes the same goes for your boss, though, "If your wedding is nearby and you're close to your boss, it can be a nice gesture to invite him or her, especially if you're asking for a lot of time off."
Handling Post-Invitation Awkwardness
You didn't invite a coworker, and it's become pretty clear that she's taking it personally. So, what can you do to rebuild your professional relationship? Granzella Larssen believes it's best to be upfront and honest. "Pull the co-worker aside and let her know that you're unfortunately not able to invite everyone you'd like. Letting her know that you're disappointed, too, and reminding her how much you value your working relationship can go a long way."
Now, About Those Vacation Days
Dying for a long honeymoon but scared to ask your boss about taking extra vacation days? Granzella Larssen says it can be worth asking, especially if you negotiate. "Approach your boss with the number of vacation days you have left and the number you'd like to take, and ask if there's any way you might be able to make up the gap. You may have to get creative — for example, taking an advance on next year's vacation time or working some extra hours before you go — or your boss may be willing to give you the extra days, especially if you've been meeting your goals."