Family, Friends & Guests Etiquette
- Question:
- I am keeping track of the guest replies, and it's totally out of control! For example, we invited three people, with their names written on the inside envelope, and we got a response of seven attending! How can we deal with these additional guests without offending anyone or throwing our budget completely out of whack?
- Answer:
Inviting an extra guest or two (or four!) to someone else's wedding is nothing less than rude, so don't lose sleep over offending these people. Call up the original invitees and tell them how happy you are that they're coming, but, unfortunately, you just can't accommodate any more than the three people you invited. If they offer to pay for the extra dinners (and many do), hold your ground. Cite maximum occupancy laws or your fears of a too-large wedding cake toppling onto the dance floor. Or, tell the truth: you've invited only your very nearest and dearest and you'd like their help in keeping it to that. If they can't attend without their entourage, they'll have to regret. And at this point, you shouldn't have any regrets of your own.
- This content originally appeared in Modern Bride magazine.
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- Can I exclude stepparents from my wedding?
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- How do we let guests know what our Plan B is?
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- How should I handle guests who RSVP with their kids when children weren't invited?
- Can I tell my cousin to stop seeing my married bridesmaid?
- How can we prevent our friends from playing a practical joke on our wedding night?
- Should I invite my fiancé's ex-girlfriend?
- How can I get my grandfather to behave at the wedding?
- Do I have to send invitations to everyone I verbally invited to the wedding?
Submit Your Own Etiquette Question
Have an etiquette question you'd like our editors to answer?
- How can I make sure that my fiancé's mom will be on time?
- How can I convince my fiancé's sister to accept me as his wife?
- Do I have to invite my cousin's boyfriend?
- Should I change my wedding date so that my grandfather can attend?
- What should I do about forgotten invites?
- Who should initate the get-together between our parents?
- How should we handle complaints about our Friday night wedding?
- Can I ask a friend to help things run smoothly on the wedding day?
- Must I invite my bad dad?
- Do I have to invite my co-workers?
- Should I invite people who can't come?
- How can I divvy up the guest list?
- How do we seat my divorced in-laws?
- Should we invite a recently divorced couple?
- Should we let one couple bring a kid?
- Must I invite my practical-joker cousin?
- Can I invite dad's parents, but not dad?
- How do we announce our two weddings?
- Should I invite my ex-husband to the wedding?
- Does dad have to be my aisle escort?
- When must I send thank-you notes?
- How should I handle a forgotten thank-you?
- Should we ditch a nervous toast-giver?
- Do I have to invite my five co-workers?
- How can I get his mother to back off?
- Should I allow one person to bring a guest?
- Should I plan extra activities for out-of-town guests?
- How do you prioritize your wedding guest list?
- Can we ask our guests to give us cash gifts?
- Which side of the aisle do guests sit on at a same-sex union?
