In early 2010, we cancelled our wedding when our infant daughter had to have immediate surgery. We ended up going to the courthouse to make things legal. Last week, I finally got a clean bill of health after a brief fight with cancer. I'm incredibly lucky, but it made me realize that there are things in my life that I truly want and things I regret. One of those regrets is not having a wedding. I never wanted a huge affair or bridal parties or anything. Mostly, I just regret we didn't get to exchange vows and I have no photos.
How can I do this in a way that is not beyond tacky? As far as who I'd invite, at maximum, it would be our immediate families. I don't really know what I'm allowed to wear or even if there's a big issue with just my husband and I just exchanging our vows on our own or if that's stupid.
I realize I might take some heat for this question, and that's fine. I know a lot of people think vow renewals are trashy and I completely understand why. It just suddenly seems so important to me.
If this is important to you, don't worry about what others think - just do it. A vow renewal ceremony can be held at any time. I recently performed a ceremony for a couple who renew their vows every year in a different state. Because you are legally married, you do not need to have a minister or judge perform the ceremony. You can ask a friend or a father or grandfather to do it, or you can write your own vows and recite them to each other. It would be inappropriate for you to wear a wedding gown, but you can certainly wear an evening gown or party dress or anything you choose.
Chances are your families will be supportive and enjoy celebrating with you. Be sure to have a photographer and a wedding cake. Other than that, do what fits your personalities and budget.