My fiance is in the military and he is being deployed. He wants to get married soon in front of a judge. However, I have always wanted a nice wedding. I know that if we were to get married when he wants to, my family wouldn't be 100% supportive of our decision so I was thinking maybe we could do it secretly.
We were thinking that we could do a courthouse wedding and when he gets back from his deployment we could have a bigger wedding (I guess people would say it's a fake wedding) with my friends and family. I would want to have a bridal party and it to look like a wedding.
Would it be possible to do it that way or do we need to follow the rules for Vow Renewals?
We are seeing more couples doing what you suggest - having a wedding after the wedding - largly because of military issues. The length of time between the actual wedding and the second wedding will affect what is more acceptable. The other issue is that, should you become pregnant before the second wedding, you may want to forgo it and instead have a vow renewal ceremony for your 5th anniversary.
We would do the courthouse wedding in March and we would have our "vow renewal" in June or August so a few months different. We both agreed that we don't want to get pregnant until at least our 1 year anniversary seeing as it would be hard for me to complete nursing school. I do know that mistakes happen though.