wedding planner

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BrideFirstLawye... Posts : 25 Registered: 5/5/09
wedding planner
Posted: May 6, 2009 2:42 AM

So is it crazy that Ive talked to and unofficially booked a wedding planner before he's actually proposed? IWe've picked out my ring setting and I know he's going to propose before June 12th (our anniversary). I've always been Type A, so I want to start making plans now because for the next few months, I'll be studying for the bar exam and won't have a chance to plan. I thought if I told a wedding planner what I want now (we're having a destination wedding), she can get things started while I study and I can pick up afterwards. However, my friends think I am sooo crazy for starting before he's actually proposed. But after years of being that "27 Dresses" girl and being with my boyfriend for 8 years, I just can't wait to get started! Can anyone empathize?

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DoesntPlayNice Posts : 809 Registered: 12/17/08
Re: wedding planner
Posted: May 6, 2009 8:57 AM Go to message in response to: BrideFirstLawye...

I think you may be jumping the gun a little. It is great to hire a planner if you know you don't have time, but what if he wants to be involved in the planning and you already told the planner what YOU want?

I wouldnt book anything or put deposits down until he actually proposes.

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NikZilla Posts : 59 Registered: 9/21/08
Re: wedding planner
Posted: May 6, 2009 10:17 AM Go to message in response to: BrideFirstLawye...

I think you should wait until you get your ring to start planning a wedding.
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ArtBride Posts : 4,838 Registered: 5/9/07
Re: wedding planner
Posted: May 6, 2009 12:28 PM Go to message in response to: BrideFirstLawye...

Personally, I don't think that the ring or the proposal makes you engaged. Deciding to marry one another makes you engaged. If you've decided to get married, why not plan it now? The proposal is just a formality and the ring is just a piece of jewelry. Neither one makes you more qualified to pick venues, food, etc than you are right now. I'd go ahead with it, especially since you know you'll be busy later with other things. Heck, you don't want wedding planning to interfere with studying for the bar. Sounds like you have your priorities right.

How does your soon-to-be-fiance feel about this? If he is uncomfortable planning anything before he has 'officially' proposed, I'd hold off on it. If he's fine with it, go for it. I'd also sound him out and find out how involved he'd like to be in the planning. Some men are happy to let their FW plan whatever she wants, others like to be involved in every little decision, and there are many degrees in between - so I wouldn't assume that you'll be doing all the planning with no input from him. My advice is to talk to him. If he's Ok with you making some basic plans before the proposal and you're both on the same page about the big stuff, I see no reason to wait.

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Lilmisssouthern... Posts : 658 Registered: 8/12/08
Re: wedding planner
Posted: May 6, 2009 12:48 PM Go to message in response to: ArtBride

I agree with Art, if it is ok with your soon to be fiance then there is no reason you shouldn't start planning. I started semi planning and met with some wedding planners before actually being engaged. It all depends on what the two of you are comfortable with.

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