Ring rules

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khans065 Posts : 1 Registered: 2/4/09
Ring rules
Posted: Feb 13, 2009 8:23 PM

Are there any 'rules' when it comes to engagement and wedding rings? Specifically, is it kosher to keep your engagement ring as your wedding ring? Do I have to buy a whole new wedding ring? I know I could get a band with the eng. ring, as a set, but is it necessary? What if the eng. ring I like doesn't come with a band? I'm a little confused and a little ill-informed when it comes to rings. Any comments will help! :) Thanks


PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: Ring rules
Posted: Feb 13, 2009 9:03 PM Go to message in response to: khans065

Basically there are NO rules!

I have a blue sapphire e-ring. It's not a 'traditional' e-ring.

My wedding band is set with diamonds and blue sapphires.

It didn't come with my e-ring, I found a ring from a custom jeweler that fit perfectly.

So, look around - figure out what you want. You don't have to have an e-ring. You just keep your e-ring as your wedding ring.

You can have a diamond or diamonds OR another stone OR NO stone!!!

Good luck!





ArtBride Posts : 4,838 Registered: 5/9/07
Re: Ring rules
Posted: Feb 14, 2009 9:21 AM Go to message in response to: khans065

It's most common for women to have a separate engagement ring and wedding ring, but there aren't any set-in-stone 'rules' about it.

If you want to use your e-ring as your wedding ring, I think that's fine. I know several people who have done that. I also know plenty of people who didn't have an e-ring at at - they just have a wedding band. I wear my wedding band every day, but I don't always wear my e-ring with it. If you're very active or do a lot of work or hobbies with your hands, you might prefer to wear a simple band for daily use, and just wear your e-ring occasionally. (I find that my e-ring can get in the way or get caught on things, since the stone is raised. That doesn't happen with my wedding band, so it's easier and safer to wear my wedding band alone if I'm doing a lot of work with my hands.)

If you want both rings, you don't have to buy them as a set. Mine weren't a set - DH bought my e-ring, and we picked out a wedding band that looked nice with it and I liked. It was also important to me that the wedding band look good on its own, as I'd already decided that the e-ring gets in my way enough that I wouldn't wear it every day after getting married. If your e-ring is an unusual style and you can't find a band that fits with it, you can always get a wedding ring custom-made. This is usually less expensive than you'd think it would be, so don't rule it out because of cost until you talk to a couple jewelers and get estimates.

One more general piece of advice about buying rings: consider comfort. Most people don't think about this when they're picking out rings, but it will become super-important to you once you're wearing them every day. My SIL stopped wearing her wedding band two months after her wedding because it was so uncomfortable. So make sure you're getting something that you'll be comfortable wearing every day for the rest of your life - or you'll end up replacing it soon.

DaisypathWedding Ticker

Vice President and Guardian of the Toilet Brush of POOP: People Offended by Offended People


LinzZ Posts : 683 Registered: 12/13/07
Re: Ring rules
Posted: Feb 14, 2009 9:46 AM Go to message in response to: khans065

You can have a e-ring with:
gem stone(s)
no "stone" and engraving
no "stone" and plain
No e-ring at all

You can wear your e-ring with your seperate wedding band, on your right had (w-ring on left hand), only on special occasions, not at all, or use it as your w-ring.

You can buy a w-ring in a set with your e-ring, find a seperate ring that goes with it, find a ring you like that doesn't match your e-ring (especially if you don't plan on wearing your e-ring with it), or your e-ring could be your w-ring.

Anything goes, so if there is an option I didn't mention, feel free to do that.

One of my co-workers has a beautiful pear cut solitaire e-ring that I admire everytime I see it. It wasn't until earlier this week that I realized she doesn't wear a w-ring with it, just the e-ring. It's still beautiful and doesn't make her any less married.


Cherish Yesterday, Dream for Tomorrow, Live Today!


auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Ring rules
Posted: Feb 14, 2009 2:17 PM Go to message in response to: khans065

dear KHans,

It's OK to do whatever you want. My step-mother got an engagement ring from my father, and wore it proudly. When they got married, she just took it off, then put it back on again, and it became her wedding ring.

Do what best suits your needs.


Having said that, you mentioned "kosher". I don't know if you are an observant Jew, but as far as I know they do have some rules about wedding rings. I am not Jewish (and I invite correction), but as I understand it because a wedding ring is a religious article, one should not tell the difference between a rich woman and a poor woman by the wedding ring. Thus, a "kosher" Jewish wedding ring is a plain gold band, with no stones nor any holes in the gold.

I read about this when I was about to become engaged, and liked the idea. So, I borrowed it from the Jews. My own wedding band is a plain, solid gold band.


CantWait2BMrsW Posts : 31 Registered: 2/13/09
Re: Ring rules
Posted: Feb 14, 2009 2:55 PM Go to message in response to: khans065

The best part of the rings is you guys get to make the rules! It's really whatever your more comfortable wearing. My mom only wears her e-ring and has never had a band. Personally I like the sets because I have a son and up until he was 6 months old, I wore the only the band in my set because I was terrified of scratching him :) Good luck!


AmyLarr Posts : 8 Registered: 2/23/09
Re: Ring rules
Posted: Feb 24, 2009 12:17 PM Go to message in response to: khans065

I have a Solitaire engagement ring and a wedding band that does not match. I ware my engagement ring when Im out and about and my band when I doing more active things. I agree with most that you can do whatever you like.

Edited by: AmyLarr on Feb 24, 2009 12:18 PM


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