BUTT UGLY !!

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SDIwifey1207 Posts : 346 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 7, 2008 10:02 PM Go to message in response to: Abc12345678

KC-

I totally agree with you that this probably wasnt the best choice for her to make. I guess I just probably wouldnt have even responded. I mean, who am I to point out the mistake of someone I dont know? Ya know? If she asked our opinion I would have said something, but other than that I woulda just let it go. However, I didnt see her original post, so maybe I am sort of biased as well. I just think certain coments made by others werent very necessary.


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SDIwifey1207 Posts : 346 Registered: 7/9/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 7, 2008 10:02 PM Go to message in response to: Abc12345678

KC-

I totally agree with you that this probably wasnt the best choice for her to make. I guess I just probably wouldnt have even responded. I mean, who am I to point out the mistake of someone I dont know? Ya know? If she asked our opinion I would have said something, but other than that I woulda just let it go. However, I didnt see her original post, so maybe I am sort of biased as well. I just think certain coments made by others werent very necessary.


<3 I'm so in love with my hunni bunni <3

                 Dec 29 ,2007

          Formerly MrsEichel1207

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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 7, 2008 11:36 PM Go to message in response to: SDIwifey1207

OK, I saw the original post, I felt uncomfortable (and was surprised by the OP) as it seemed unprofessional and the OP has info to ID them in their profile.

I was surprised by the OP, as there hadn't been anything before from her that was in line with this post.

And I'm with SDI - i.e. prior to this I chose not to respond to let it go.  guess that's shot to hell now. 


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futuremrsmason Posts : 239 Registered: 3/21/08
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 11:06 AM Go to message in response to: Amaryillis

yawn...

Apparently we are all in sync this month in our cycles, because I don't think I've seen reg. Brides posters this caught up over a deleted post in a LONG while...

I will say that I can understand venting about a client, while finding it inappropriate on a brides forum, just for the fact that if you supply too many details, they could easily be found on a google search, or even a reg. brides search, by the client in question. Too many details, and they know its them.

If she is a real wedding planner (which I've kinda doubted a lil bit since the post your colors, and she described a "sunshine yellow and salmon pink" wedding using words like frothy - too much like a writer, less of a planner...), I can relate in finding irritance at someone who picks something with no regard to your advice. Recently, I shot engagements for a couple of friends. I showed them the unedits for them to choose from. Two weeks later, they had edited them themselves, in BAD ways. It made me sick, and I'm pretty sure I vented a LOT. Not on here, but to ppl I knew. Not completely the same, but I can empathize in being pissed off, because they are your "work of art", if you will. Either in wedding planning, photography, etc, the way they end up looking is directly reflective on your professional abilities.
That being said, Kelley, would it not irritate you to no end of a young lady bride of yours chose a dress which was not flattering? (although I know you probably wouldn't make an entire post about it...)
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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 11:25 AM Go to message in response to: futuremrsmason

That being said, Kelley, would it not irritate you to no end of a young lady bride of yours chose a dress which was not flattering? (although I know you probably wouldn't make an entire post about it...)

No; it wouldnt irritate me to no end at all. If she was my client; then Im being paid to support and help her; not talk about her behind her back. I would NEVER create a post like that about any client; it just doesnt look good and its not how I do business. I really believe when you take someone on as a client to help them plan their entire wedding; they are paying for in a sense for you to be their FRIEND and ally. So if her dress did not suit her well; I would talk to HER about that; very gently. And I would find a way to make her feel like the most beautiful person on earth by showing her how a different dress would accentuate all the great things about her. Thats what I am there for; and my clients know they can TRUST me when they hire me. And if I were a bride walking into someones office and I later foudn out they had "vented" about me on a message board; not only would I be LIVID; I would fire them instantly. Its just not right. Period.

Again; needing to VENT about clients is FINE. But do it with other vendor friends you trust; your family, or friends. NOT HERE. Its just a boneheaded thing to do.


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MsDenuninani Posts : 3,962 Registered: 3/16/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 11:28 AM Go to message in response to: futuremrsmason

A couple of thoughts, and then I'm starting a thread to discuss something that I've been thinking about for awhile and that this thread brought up. . .

I imagine this OP to be an actual wedding planner, but a young, inexperienced one.  Or it could be an imaginary business.  But, for the sake of argument, I'll go with the former.

Anyways, the thing is, I hired a wedding planner, and I used to ask her ALL THE TIME about the hideous choices other people made.  I would ask the videographers and photographers as well.  I liked asking "What is the tackiest thing that you've seen a bride do?"  Some would answer, many would not.  Didn't change my opinion of them, honestly, as I was pretty confident in my choices and even if they bad-mouthed them, I'd still not sweat it.

Wedding planners and other vendors go to conventions and talk and mingle with eachother all the time.  I have a hard time believing they don't talk about their clients.  Everyone in the service industry does.  I think that being a wedding planner and complaining about the tastes of your client on a website aimed towards brides is pretty risky, but I don't think it's beyond the pale.  If she really wanted to talk about it, it would have been smarter to say that she just talked to a "friend", but even if she had, people would have bashed her anyway, because, bottom line, the brides on these forums don't like to hear other brides personal tastes dissed.  They just don't.  Period. 

So I guess I'm saying that this chick would have been bashed no matter what.  Even if she had not been a wedding planner at all. 


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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 11:40 AM Go to message in response to: MsDenuninani

Well thats not true for me MrsD. I am not bashing her - Im saying its completely unprofessional. She is the only one bashing here,and she is bashing her own client which is awful. Yes; of course vendors talk to each other about clients ... but you do it in a way that is keeping it anonymous enough for that person to not know WHO you are speaking of. "I had a client once that drove me nuts etc etc" ... thats not going to get back to that person. But posting it here it could VERY WELL get back to that person, and even if it doesnt, I just would NEVER want to be known as the vendor who talks trash about her clients; especially seconds after they leave my office. Cmon. Its just wrong. So for me, its about the fact that she is a professional and shes not working in the best interest of her clients.

Which is why I have trouble even believing she is a REAL vendor. I dont get WHY anyone would do something like that and not know its dumb. New in the business or not; Im new too ..but even I know you just dont do that.

The end.


"THE AISLE RUNNER" has officially launched - www.myaislerunner.com

My awesome partner LIZA helped me lose FOURTEEN POUNDS in Biggest Loser 6; and I won the big CASH prize!!!! Thanks Teammate!!! BL7 here we come with more weight loss....

"When you're born, you get a free ticket to the Freak Show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat." - R.I.P. George Carlin

 

 

 

 

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MsDenuninani Posts : 3,962 Registered: 3/16/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 11:51 AM Go to message in response to: kelleyiskelley

its about the fact that she is a professional and shes not working in the best interest of her clients.

Agreed.


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"I'm asking you to believe.  Not just in my ability to bring about real change in Washington. . .I'm asking you to believe in yours." - Barack Obama

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ArtBride Posts : 4,838 Registered: 5/9/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 2:46 PM Go to message in response to: MsDenuninani

I finally made it over to check out all the fuss about this thread.

Personally, I don't have a problem with a thread about ugly dresses or tacky stuff that we've seen at other people's weddings. I talk about that stuff myself and enjoy it, but the difference is that I am not a paid vendor, I'm a guest. I agree with Kelley that it is unprofessional and frankly, pretty stupid to create a post like this on a public forum that your client might visit. This is a wedding planning message board, so the chances that a BRIDE might visit are fairly high. Do you really think that your clients are so dumb that they wouldn't recognize the stories you tell as being about them and then look at your profile and figure out who you are? Does this seem like an intelligent professional decision? Not to me.

Amarylis, I'm just going to come right out and say it. We get that you're a wedding planner. You somehow manage to include that information in EVERY post, whether it is relevant or not. Frankly, I find it quite nauseating. Everything you post appears to be a subtle advertisement for your business. While you don't come right out and say, 'I'm available to plan your weddings,' the fact that you manage to work the words 'I'm a wedding planner' into EVERY SINGLE POST is pretty obnoxious. Maybe it isn't your intention to come across like this, but that's how it reads.

I don't have a problem with you coming on here to look for ideas or to share opinions. It's nice when vendors offer helpful advice to brides. Perhaps you can take the opportunity to learn a little about what brides expect in a wedding planner and what we DON'T like (for example, we don't like knowing that our planner is badmouthing us). Take it as a learning experience and remember that while you may be a wedding planner, you do NOT know everything. From reading some of your posts, I can confidently say that you are REMARKABLY naive about weddings in other areas of the country from you and rather judgemental about weddings that cost more than you might spend on an average wedding in your part of the country. Neither of these things are attractive qualities in a planner. I mean that simply as helpful advice.

So please continue to participate in discussions here, but please lay off mentioning your job/business in every single post. We're glad that you seem to be getting a lot of business, but we don't need to hear about every client. It would be much less obnoxious and perhaps very HELPFUL to hear about clients once in a while when it was actually relevent to a conversation.


DaisypathWedding Ticker

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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 4:12 PM Go to message in response to: Amaryillis

Hallelujah and A-Freakin-MEN Artbride!:)

"THE AISLE RUNNER" has officially launched - www.myaislerunner.com

My awesome partner LIZA helped me lose FOURTEEN POUNDS in Biggest Loser 6; and I won the big CASH prize!!!! Thanks Teammate!!! BL7 here we come with more weight loss....

"When you're born, you get a free ticket to the Freak Show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat." - R.I.P. George Carlin

 

 

 

 

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NJ4Life Posts : 3,358 Registered: 8/10/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 4:37 PM Go to message in response to: kelleyiskelley

And kelley can you NOT refer to this chick as Ama please. You're confusing me AND offending me at the same time.  ;)  Tee hee
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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,590 Registered: 7/2/06
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 4:48 PM Go to message in response to: NJ4Life

LOLOL Sorry AMA ... I shall never do that again. I guess I will have to resort to spelling our the entire name. Man, what a chore.:) The things I do for you ...

"THE AISLE RUNNER" has officially launched - www.myaislerunner.com

My awesome partner LIZA helped me lose FOURTEEN POUNDS in Biggest Loser 6; and I won the big CASH prize!!!! Thanks Teammate!!! BL7 here we come with more weight loss....

"When you're born, you get a free ticket to the Freak Show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat." - R.I.P. George Carlin

 

 

 

 

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kroberts Posts : 443 Registered: 7/30/07
Re: BUTT UGLY !!
Posted: Jul 8, 2008 8:36 PM Go to message in response to: kelleyiskelley

Granted I came late to the thread and didn't read what was originally posted, but I don't see what the problem is.

We've all thought it, "Her dress is SO ugly!" or "Who in their right mind would do that to themselves?" I've seen TV SHOWS dedicated to the worse wedding choices ever made. What's the difference if a professional saw an ugly dress and wanted to share her laugh with us? If she posted pictures that showed her client's faces, then there's a problem. Again, I didn't see the original post, but I've done that with my friends and family. "Don't look now, but..." OR "If I EVER show interest in an outfit like that, you have my permission to commit me."

So she did it with a client, I would like to see what she thinks is ugly.


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