I spoiled my surprise...UPDATE!

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daybug Posts : 159 Registered: 10/7/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 4:06 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

I was kind of in the same boat before we got engaged. Long story short, FH was not discreet AT ALL about buying me a ring. Questions all the time about what I liked and disliked as far as rings go, etc. Then last year at Christmas-time, he ended up leaving my place nearly a week early to go back to his hometown to "get some things done." I, of course, was upset, since we were in separeate grad schools at the time and didn't get to see one another that much as it was. So I kept saying "I'll just come with you" He countered with "No, you can't be around." I would ask what he planned on doing at home and he'd tell me "Spending time with my mom" (they're not THAT close!) "Shopping" (he HATES to shop!) "I need my mom's expertise while I shop" (she's HUGE into diamonds). So it was like DUH!! I knew all along why he was leaving early, I just liked to annoy him with all the questions.

Well, my birthday is in March and about a month prior, he kept saying march was going to be the best month, we'd have so much to celebrate in addition to my birthday. Real smooth. So, one weekend in while I was visiting him at grad school, I snooped around his room and FOUND THE RING BOX, the papers, everythign!!! I wanted so badly to open it, but I couldn't bring myself to do it (terrible, I know).  I was slightly disappointed when I left that Sunday after being sure he'd pop the question that weekend, but he didn't. Turns out, it happened the next weekend while he was visiting me and it was perfect! So, in a way, I spoiled it (I knew it was coming) just didn't know exactly when. I still like to tell people, though, when they ask about the proprosal how not secretive he was!


Message was edited by: daybug

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LinzZ Posts : 683 Registered: 12/13/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 4:07 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

I had always told me DH that I wanted to be able to call my family right away and that I wanted to look nice. Haha. So one day, about a week after he and my cousin went ring shopping together (I knew they went) he tells me that he wants to go to dinner Saturday night (we never make advanced plans) and then later in the week, he tells me to dress up. Then that night, he insists on driving and borrowed his dad's car (don't ask me why????) Before we left, he told me to double check that I had my phone with me. We were going to dinner at the restraunt we went to on our first date. All of this was just raising red flags left and right. So I knew all week that it was coming on Saturday. We went to a local park first to watch the sunset over the lake, and on our way down the beach headed back to the car, he stops walking, pulls me to him and asks me to marry him. My heart stopped. I was expecting it a million times that night, but that exact moment still caught me off guard and surprised me. It was perfect. Just because you know the day, doesn't mean you know how, when, or what emotions you'll have. Good luck and Congratulations. 

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triplej Posts : 92 Registered: 9/3/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 4:34 PM Go to message in response to: daybug

okay so these stories totally reminded me of a funny thing (I can laugh about it now) that happened to me when I thought I ruined my surprise. 

About 3 years ago (FH and I had been together for about 2 years  and had already talked about marriage and what not) I got into his glovebox of his car to get some gum while I waited while he ran into his bank real quick. I found a ZALES bag with a ring sized box in it. I freaked out and slammed it shut assuming that I found my ring! Fast forward 4 months later (past christmas, my birthday, valentines day and our anniversary) and he tells me that he can finally give his best friend back his ring box that he had been holding. I could not hold it back and began uncontrollably sobbing because I thought it was for me! (haha now) He felt SO bad, and I felt so dumb.

I had many "oh I think it is going to happen," and then it didn't moments for the past 5 years and then finally it did! And it was totally worth it! Sorry to steal some of the spotlight, but I thought it was funny and had to share!


Jamie : )

July 12, 2008 is the day I marry my everything!

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BenjaminsWife Posts : 1,069 Registered: 1/11/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 4:34 PM Go to message in response to: LinzZ

We were out ring shopping and my DH bought my ring... I was so excited  because I thought I'd be able to wear it right away....but nooooo..he was like you cant have it until I propose. I got so upset and said well then why did you buy the ring while I was there. Anyways....i pouted for 3 days straight while he's trying to come up with a elaborate way to propose....of course he couldnt get any of them to come together so he proposed at midnight in his boxers right after we had gotten into a fight. I started the fight because I was so upset that I couldnt have my ring.

So it's not the most romantic proposal....and I think he figured out the best thing to do is propose first and then buy the damn ring. But I doubt there'll be a next time.


Formerly San Ramon Bride

The Big Day: 9/20/08

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PrincessL Posts : 7 Registered: 2/4/08
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 5:48 PM Go to message in response to: ryanne

Don't feel bad. It was a mistake. It will still be joyous even though you knew it was gonna happen.

Plus since you all have been talking about it, it would have not been that much of a surprise if he did pop the question on a random day.

 I think the real deal is that you are upset that you won't be surprised. I would be too. I was the kid that would sneak and look for my XMAS presents and then be mad on xmas morning when opening my presents b/c I knew everything I was getting.

 Be happy that you will be surounded by your honey and friends and familly when he does it. So you can celebrate with them!

 That was the worst for me having to sit through dinner after he proposed knowing. I wanted to call everyone in my phone book!

 Cheers to you here's a pre-CONGRATS!


Be all that you can, dream all that you want, be thankful for all that you have!

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MrsWilliams2008 Posts : 1,431 Registered: 7/19/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 5:55 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

Well I kinda know what you're feeling. I didn't know my FH was going to propose until the day he did it. He was just acting REALLY weird and fidgety all day and I just KNEW by the end of the night we'd be engaged. I didn't tell him I'd already figured it out, I just let him have his moment.

I do believe I did a good job of being surprised. I suggest you do the same, REALLY try not to anticipate the hour or the exact way he'll propose. Just have a great time and let things fall into place


 http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/RyAnne Stafford&RobertWilliams, Jr

                                 R&R: June 21, 2008

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marty08 Posts : 1,110 Registered: 7/1/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 6:12 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

I knew everything...what my ring looked like, how much, where, when....HE TOLD MY LIFE LONG BEST FRIEND....silly guy...so now he thinks the two of them have this "bond"...that they "pulled one on me"....I feel bad, but I knew something was up and got it out of my friend...silly girl!!

I would never ever tell fh....what was he thinking...my best friend...geesh...!!

He started playing 20 questions...it was sooo hard trying to come up with answers...I was trying to guess what he got me...for his birthday...umm...cotton ball??, ummm... water??...Is it for the dog too??...It was funny...


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RosalieB Posts : 87 Registered: 1/12/08
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 6:39 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

similar situation myself. my fh and his father were talking in the room RIGHT NEXT To me about sports random stuff and then his dad was like "so this proposal thing?" really loud and i ran down the hall and starting humming. i was so embarrashed. fh still managed to surprise me by not proposing in  a fancy way because who would have expected that! it was perfect for me. but i felt so bad for overhearing. silly ffil talking WAY too loud. lol

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RosalieB Posts : 87 Registered: 1/12/08
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 6:45 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

similar situation myself. my fh and his father were talking in the room RIGHT NEXT To me about sports random stuff and then his dad was like "so this proposal thing?" really loud and i ran down the hall and starting humming. i was so embarrashed. fh still managed to surprise me by not proposing in  a fancy way because who would have expected that! it was perfect for me. but i felt so bad for overhearing. silly ffil talking WAY too loud. lol

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JAllen Posts : 793 Registered: 9/1/06
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 8, 2008 10:19 PM Go to message in response to: RosalieB

I still kinda have hard feelings about my "proposal".  Back story:  I was 17 when I found out I was pregnant, so everyone assumed I'd marry the guy.  So we got married.  That was 12 years ago.  I have been with FH for 6 years now.  I always stressed to him that I didn't want to talk about getting married because when I got engaged I wanted it to be a complete and emotional surprise.  So we went back home for a vacation, to visit family, and go to my 10 year class reunion(2 years ago).  We go out to dinner with my dad, and they keep asking me to refill our chips, ok, so I'm skeptical, and I figured what was going on.  So then they send me to pick up my best friend and say they will ride together to our next stop.  So I get to my bffs house and tell her what I think!  Ok, bad idea, she's a nosy "have to know everything about everything" kinda girl.  And so later that night, she asks FH to walk outside with her to have a cigerette.  They are gone for over an hour, leaving me alone in the bar.  Now, I'm not jealous of them, the thing is, she has a history of taking off with guys and leaving me behind, alone, at the bar.  And he knew how much I hated it and how much it hurt me.  So for him to turn around and leave me there, my blood was boiling.  Anyway, they couldn't find me for awhile, and they realized they screwed up.  So we went back to my moms how and went for a walk.  I was so hurt and upset, crying that I couldn't believe that he allowed her to pull hiim out and leave me alone for so long knowing the history there.  So, basically he ended up telling me that the whole reason they were out there so long is because he got so excited about talking to her about his plans and our relationship and all that that he totally lost track of time and what was going on.  He was so sorry, and he didn't mean to hurt me.  I felt terrible.  I should have known that that is what was going on, and I should have let it go before he felt like he had to "confess" and propose right then.  Not exactly what I had in mind for a surprise and emotion experience! lol  So, it still hurts alittle to see shows and videos and stuff like this where he asks and she is caught off guard, and starts crying and blah blah blah.  I sooooo wanted that! lol  Oh well, I got the guy, and I have a gorgous ring so what do I have to worry about! lol

 

http://www.mywedding.com/vanceandjammie/

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bri88 Posts : 17 Registered: 1/29/08
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 11, 2008 10:55 PM Go to message in response to: JAllen

Ok so I am officially engaged!!! He did end up proposing on Saturday, but totally not at all when I expected. It was adorable and totally us. I had actually convinced myself that he wasn't going to propose, because he is the most nervous person ever, and he was acting totally normal. I thought that he would have been panicking if he was actually going to propose... wow was I wrong!

Before the beer pong games started, we were going over the rules and stuff, and I said that we were ready to play, when Brian stood up and said that he needed to go over one more thing. He came up to me and told me that our "uniforms" weren't what he wanted to wear ( I had t-shirts made), and he wanted to change them.

He handed me a new tshirt all bundled up, and I was actually kinda annoyed because I LOVED the tshirts that I had made. After I protested a bit, I opened the tshirt, and the shirt said "the engaged team" on it. I put the tshirt down and he was on his knee with the ring. It was so cute and honestly since I was expecting it later on that night, I was still shocked.

So it all worked out better than I could have imagined, and was so perfect. I am now totally overwhelmed but so excited to plan the wedding! Thanks ladies for all your help and stories!

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triplej Posts : 92 Registered: 9/3/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 11, 2008 10:59 PM Go to message in response to: bri88

YAY!! Congratulations girlie!! I am so excited for you, that sounded SO cute! 

Jamie : )

July 12, 2008 is the day I marry my everything!

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49ersfanatic Posts : 581 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 12, 2008 6:24 AM Go to message in response to: bri88

That is very cute and adorable. Congratulations. I hope you didn't take any offense to my first post. I'm glad it happened in a way that is totally you guys. Good luck and happy planning.


DH and I Rolled the Dice and Took a Gamble at Marriage on July 15, 2006 at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas! Viva Las VegasLaughing

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Fitzer Posts : 643 Registered: 8/7/07
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 12, 2008 10:49 AM Go to message in response to: bri88

Yay!  Congrats!  When my FH proposed to me, I had been expecting it for a long time, and he did it a few days before my birthday - so I was thinking it would come on my birthday, but instead he surprised me by doing it at the most random time, before my big birthday surprise.

Even when you expect it, you don't.  I was still completely floored and thinking, "Is this really happening!?!"  Anyway, yay for you, and enjoy staring at your new ring for the next few days (weeks, months...)!

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bri88 Posts : 17 Registered: 1/29/08
Re: I spoiled my surprise...
Posted: Feb 12, 2008 9:27 PM Go to message in response to: 49ersfanatic

No offense taken at all! You had a question and you asked it. How could I be irritated at that? I think people tend to get a little too sensitive about things like that, but I think I am probably the hardest person to offend ever! So no worries!

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