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Offically Unoffically engaged

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Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 8, 2006 2:09 PM

It's weird that I'm engaged, sort of. I can do all the planning, and our date is set, but since I don't have my ring, he's paying it off, we're not offical. He says I have to have a ring to make it real but I do't really care about the ring. I don't really know what to do. I want to tell everyone we're engaged and beable to say he's my fiance, but he doesn't want that yet. I know he's trying his best to buy me a really nice ring but he's the only one that works, I saty hom ewth our son, so he doesn't have to go in daycare. I don't know what's up his macho pride.

Is it ok if I start telling people or should I just wait and do my planning?

june_2008 , engaged
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Guest
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 8, 2006 2:12 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I would say to wait (even though it sucks).  You could use this time to just start researching, getting things together, etc.  That way when you officially announce your engagment you know what you want to do.

A&W

 

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serendipity3033 Posts : 363 Registered: 5/11/06
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 8, 2006 7:04 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Id say pick and choose who you tell now... those that are the closest to you obviously, and those that are stupid can wait...lol... My ring just came in, but I was supposed to wait until December for an official proposal... yeah right!  I tried it on, and Im not taking it off!!!! hahahaha... Ive only showed it to the select few, and I kinda hide my hand when others who would have mmmmm... comments... are around.  =)

 

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Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 8, 2006 9:29 PM Go to message in response to: serendipity3033

Waiting is sooo hard!! The ring is hidden away from me (and has been since August... I have a picture of it bookmarked on my computer!!)  He's asking my parents' permission this week... he's a bit nervous!!  I should have it before Thanksgiving.  I can't wait... my phrase is "pee my pants excited"!!

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Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 10, 2006 2:18 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I haven't gotten my ring yet either.  BUT I found the setting I REALLY want.  It's the Zales diamond setting.  Exclusive to them, but SOOO gorgeous!!!

I am using discretion and not mentioning to anyone how excited I am or anxious to start really planning.  Most folks will think I have jumped the gun.  That's why you girls are such a help to me.  Ya'll understand. 

As hard as it is, wait to tell folks until he has the ring, it may not matter to you, but it does matter to him. A guy wants to be able to provide (usually) I think that is very respectable. 

When did you set your date for?


   ~Rebecca

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Guest
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 14, 2006 9:16 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Wow.  I cannot tell you how awesome it is to hear someone else in my EXACT situation.  My honey is paying off a ring too and I know he wants to get me something special.  We are planning the wedding and have decided on a date and everything but the only one I can tell is my mom!  It is so hard b/c I want to shout it from the rooftops but I am respecting his wishes to not announce it until it is offical and he give me the ring and official proposal. 

proposal
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Guest
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 15, 2006 9:36 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Wow i feel so much better... im in the exact situation. well my Fh doesnt live here he lives in Jamaica so i have to wait til christmas til i get it... the only thing is that i have already told ppl... and my Fh is okay with it

<img border="0" src="http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10711;114/st/20070714/e/I+Marry+My+Boobear/k/9abb/event.png"></a>

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allymo23 Posts : 441 Registered: 9/14/06
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 16, 2006 3:18 AM Go to message in response to: Guest

I am pretty much the same too. I am planning tho! I only have til June so I kinda had to start. I say, if hes ok with it, there is no reason not to start planning!

Agape,

Ally

           I can't believe I'm marrying my Best FriendKiss

 

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Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Nov 16, 2006 4:13 PM Go to message in response to: allymo23

I tell ya, I had gotten enough crap from certain people who kept harping "where's the ring?  when's the date?"  WE HAD TO GET MY HOUSE SOLD AND WERE TRYING TO FIND A PLACE TO LIVE!    Boy, when we did set a date and found my ring, it was such sweet "told you so!"  But it was essential to start planning and getting prices, and a lot of the date depended on if we were going to do a DW.  

 

Plan away!   It will all come together!


 

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Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Jan 18, 2007 5:57 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I haven't got my ring yet, but my FH already has it all picked out and is picking it up soon, but we're not making it official for another like 6 months (i told him I don't want to know what the ring looks like or when and how he's going to officially propose as I want some tradition involved, lol) SO I'm not telling family or others till then (especially since I don't think my parents will be able to meet him till june, when they're all in one place for my senior show), however I did tell 3 of my girl friends, two of which are going to be my bridesmaids, so they're having fun teasing me and hiding the brides magazines and websites, lol.

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Emerald928 Posts : 155 Registered: 3/31/06
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Jan 24, 2007 6:37 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Wow ladies...I thought I was the only one in this situation. FH (if I can call him that Tongue out) and I have picked out two or three different ring settings, and he's just waiting until he can pay for it (He's halfway there) before we make it official. We've been together for over 3 years now, but since we're both in college, money (and the timing) just hasn't worked. Our whole family considers us engaged minus a ring, so I guess you could say that we are officially unofficial as well. We have a date picked out (not for another two years though), so I started gathering ideas to make myself feel better. haha.

 My question to you ladies is....What do you call FH when talking about him or introducing him? I feel like a high schooler when I call him my boyfriend, but he's not officially my fiance. What's your take???

engaged
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Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Jan 28, 2007 6:49 PM Go to message in response to: Emerald928

I with you ladies! I found the ring I want, and .... I am going to buy it....Monday actually, is that weird? and then he is going to pick it up...and give it to me ...when he is ready...I am like I AM READY ALL READY!

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TheFutureMrsGad... Posts : 4 Registered: 1/10/07
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Feb 16, 2007 11:20 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

wow, so I'm not the only one in this situation either!!!! FH was out of work but proposed to me by giving me his grandmother's ring...but he's getting a new job and then going to talk to my father about marriage...so a few people know but I havent told any of my family yet or asked anyone to be in my wedding just yet. (although I want to BADLY!)  We havent set a date, just a year so far (2009) because so much will depend on when we will graduate from college. So I say wait and plan...when its official THEN tell everyone! But its all up to you and him on if u want to tell ppl or not

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TJsLady Posts : 22 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Aug 30, 2007 10:58 PM Go to message in response to: TheFutureMrsGad...

I'm in the same boat.  My FH has given me the go-ahead to start planning our wedding and he has recently started shopping around for rings... I told him I wanted him to pick out my ring on his own (I like surprises!).

I think we have a date picked out --our 3-year anniversary (05 JUL 2008) seems most appropriate right now, but that could change (depending on how soon he makes everything official!).  Basically he says whatever makes me happy is fine with him...(Why does he have to be SO difficult?)

My 29th birthday is about a month away and I told him that I didn't want an engagement ring for my birthday (or for Christmas) because I wanted the day we became officially engaged to be special in its own right.  I think he understands that.

He says we are not engaged because he doesn't have the ring, yet.  He says he wants "to do it right."  I think he is stressing too much over the whole ring thing...  To me an E-ring is just bling to show off to others... what matters most is the two people and the love they share and the committment they make to each other...

 

engaged
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ChucksGrl0215 Posts : 407 Registered: 8/27/07
Re: Offically Unoffically engaged
Posted: Aug 31, 2007 11:57 AM Go to message in response to: TJsLady

I am in pretty much the same situation. We have been looking at rings and I have found some that I like and one that I love. It's just a matter of when he finally decides to do it. I've started planning in my head what I want although we probably wouldn't get married until 2010 so I have plenty of time. I'm not telling anyone although I did mention to some co workers and one friend that we have started looking at rings. I would hold off on telling people until you have the ring. I know it sucks (i'm dying to tell my mom, sister and nana) but it will be worth it.


"All you need to do is decide what to do with the time that is given to you."

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