Don't want to regret!!

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Soon2BeArmyWife Posts : 2 Registered: 5/15/11
Don't want to regret!!
Posted: May 15, 2011 11:14 PM

I got engaged feb 2011...my fiancee and I have been going back a forward about having a wedding...As of today my fiancee does not want to have a wedding...which I was okay with a first...but after thinking about it for 2 months now I'm def not okay with it!...he said to me "if I have to stand in front of all of these people...I will feel very uncomfortable" and the last thing that i want to do is make him feel uncomfortable...but I really want to have the wedding that I have always dreamed of...I don't want to regret not having the wedding og my dreams because he feels "uncomfortable"...What to do...what to do?

Edited by: Soon2BeArmyWife on May 15, 2011 11:14 PM

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Aunt Posts : 794 Registered: 12/31/10
Re: Don't want to regret!!
Posted: May 16, 2011 12:32 AM Go to message in response to: Soon2BeArmyWife

Dear AW,

Welcome to the world of Marital Compromise.

Get used to it, Sweetie.

It's time to go back to your guy and come up with some formula by which each is more or less happy with the outcome. Part of compromise is giving up the childhood dream. Another huge part of compromise is no one totally caves in to the other. You both get a little, give a little.

Here's one that might work: Have a small wedding with just family and close friends in attendance, not "all those people".

Or: Look into a destination wedding where you stand on a beach at sunset and say your vows. Romantic, meaningful and "all those people" won't be there.

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Soon2BeArmyWife Posts : 2 Registered: 5/15/11
Re: Don't want to regret!!
Posted: May 17, 2011 12:04 PM Go to message in response to: Aunt

yeah you're def right about that...and I did...I even brought my dress...I said to him "how sure are you about having a wedding." He responded by saying "Yes baby I'm sure...get the dress"...I brought the dress and I feel like I will NEVER be able to wear the dress...we sorta kind of agreed on Vegas, but I would like my family there...idk...

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PLysak Posts : 288 Registered: 7/8/07
Re: Don't want to regret!!
Posted: May 29, 2011 10:08 AM Go to message in response to: Soon2BeArmyWife

Maybe your fiance is uncomfortable with a large crowd plus the formality of the ceremony. If that's the case, then a good compromise would be to have the Vegas wedding ceremony, then have a more casual party when you two get back. Then you'd get the big broohaha with your family, and he may be more relaxed about it since the formalities have already been taken care of. I believe that etiquette says you can have a party up to 1 year after you guys get married. Would something like that work for you two?

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