I just need to vent!

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zsazsazsu Posts : 2 Registered: 5/5/11
I just need to vent!
Posted: May 5, 2011 4:15 PM

My bf and I have been together 6 yrs on the 22nd and we have began the engagement preparations! We found the ring and he knows exactly when and how he wants to propose which he will not tell anyone!! We have an idea of how where when and who... but then the backtracking begins...

I got offered to go on a work trip that was a once in a lifetime opportunity and I definitely would not have been able to afford it by myself so my bf offered to help me pay it off.... with was like 2 ring payments.... then my bf got into a car accident... another 1000. So with all that said and done we had to somewhat downgrade my ring. Same setting different diamond which is to be determined. He assures me that everything is going to work out and that he's just going to have to push some things out (NOO!!!) and that we'll be ok. But I just keep thinking that we are taking steps back. I just dont know what to do and how to handle this. My hope is beginning to shatter!!

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Mrslinnben Posts : 2,285 Registered: 6/4/07
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: May 5, 2011 4:57 PM Go to message in response to: zsazsazsu

Sounds like life is interrupting your life. Meaning your plans are not going the way you want them to...STOP!! First and foremost is your BF's health.

How bad do you want the ring that you guys are originally looking at? Are you willing to downgrade your ring? How bad do you want to take that trip? Are you willing to cancel your trip in order save money?

You need to take a deep breath, stop thinking about your upcoming engagement, stop thinking about the ring and face reality.

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zsazsazsu Posts : 2 Registered: 5/5/11
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: May 5, 2011 5:37 PM Go to message in response to: Mrslinnben

I think were both overwhelmed. And i forgot to mention that it was a fender bender that no one was hurt in except his bumper thank goodness and that wasnt his fault which is even more irritating because the insurance companies and all that. Any who were just like i said overwhelmed and not knowing how to handle it.

I dont mind downgrading the ring because its what has to happen and the trip already happened. Its just a lot of things all at once and we never had all this craziness when we werent talking of getting engaged. So we're both kind of like where did this all come from and why now. I think because of all of this chaos its making us stronger in the long run so I just need to tell myself, ourselves it will be ok...

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Aunt Posts : 794 Registered: 12/31/10
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: May 5, 2011 8:04 PM Go to message in response to: zsazsazsu

Dear ZsaZsa,

Guess what: You don't need a ring to be engaged. You are engaged from the moment the two of you agree to get married.

My suggestion is this. Talk it over with your boyfriend and see what he thinks about just telling everyone "We're Engaged!" without a ring.

Then, go on with your life. Go on your trip, get the car fixed, whatever, and get whatever kind of ring you can best afford sometime in the future.

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FutureMrsDJLeo Posts : 615 Registered: 2/26/09
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: May 6, 2011 12:34 AM Go to message in response to: zsazsazsu

As Mrslinneben put it, it's just life getting in the way of life. Sometimes you plan for things, and unexpected things happen. Think of it as a test for the two of you though. Being engaged can be stressful at times because not only are you both planning a huge event, but your also (hopefully) deciding on where you will live, how you will raise children if you have any, religious/political differences, etc.

When life throws curveballs at you, it's just more tests. These are ways to see how you guys will work together under the pressure of every day life. If you two are meant to be, then you'll work through them together. If not, you'll catch on to it quickly and either find a way to work it all out, or decide on not getting married.

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Mrslinnben Posts : 2,285 Registered: 6/4/07
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: May 6, 2011 1:08 PM Go to message in response to: zsazsazsu

I totally understand one thing happening another. 2010 was like that for me and its still not happening.

Ausgust 2010 made 2 trips to my MIL's (5 hr road trip ea way). September another 5 hr road trip to MIL & a speeding ticket. November 2010 another road trip 7 hr ea way), my friend moved in with hubby & I for from Thanksgiving. December 2010 my dad was admitted to the hospital, January 2011, friend moves out & dad still in the hospital, then is transferred for rehab, end of March 2011 he is back in the hospital, then is admitted to long term nursing care and is still there.

Basically, my head has been spinning since last year, one thing after another I can't seem to catch a breath, but thru all of this I have learned to leave at the most inappropriate times, guess what its okay!

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wzq103 Posts : 1,190 Registered: 9/11/12
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: Sep 13, 2012 2:08 AM Go to message in response to: zsazsazsu

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swichwang34 Posts : 657 Registered: 9/13/12
Re: I just need to vent!
Posted: Sep 15, 2012 6:45 PM Go to message in response to: zsazsazsu

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