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Going crazy, please help me.

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bride11 Posts : 8 Registered: 4/23/11
Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Apr 23, 2011 10:22 AM

We are getting married in October, we ve been together for 5 years and he treats me great. I love him very much and I couldn't picture my life without him, nor do I want to. It just seems like for the last few month I've been in a rut. I think it may be cold feet, but its so bad sometimes that I think it may be something more. Its all I think about all day long and I cant even pinpoint what it is that I'm afraid of. I do have an anxiety disorder, so I may just be overthinking things but I just don't know anymore. My fiance is very supportive and we talk about it all the time, I just can't get rid of these feelings. I'm supposed to be excited and happy. Do you think I'm overthinking or do you think something is really wrong? I want him to be my husband and the father of my children, I really do. I just want to feel more comfortable with it.. Please help.

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Aunt Posts : 796 Registered: 12/31/10
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Apr 23, 2011 10:27 AM Go to message in response to: bride11

Dear Bride11,

Sometimes a nagging little feeling that something might be wrong means there is something that might be wrong.

Given the fact that you have an anxiety disorder, I suggest you need more help than can be given over an internet message board.

I assume you are seeing a psychiatrist for the anxiety disorder. Can you ask your doctor for a referral to a psychologist or therapist? I think you need to discuss your feelings of cold feet with a person trained to listen and offer sound advice, and who understands the ramifications of your anxiety disorder.

I have a very good friend with an anxiety disorder. Once he found a good psychiatrist and a good therapist, his life changed around. If he were here today responding to your message, I know he would tell you the same thing.

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bride11 Posts : 8 Registered: 4/23/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Apr 23, 2011 10:55 AM Go to message in response to: Aunt

I am seeing a therapist, have been for going on 4 years. I just wanted some opinions from people who might be suffering from cold feet and how they dealt with it.

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Soon2BMrsOrtiz1... Posts : 10 Registered: 5/2/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: May 4, 2011 7:18 PM Go to message in response to: bride11

I too use to suffer from anxiety very bad, so I can understand where you are coming from.

On that note, be aware that sometimes you might be taking some small feelings and making them bigger....

I am getting married this November and sometimes I find myself feeling the same way. Getting married is a huge commitment and even though you have been with your fiancé for 5 years I believe we all gets doubts at times or cold feet. When you start feeling doubts or cold feet, remind yourself of the good qualities that make you love your fiancé and all the fun times you have shared. Also, I sometimes think about how life would be without my fiancé and it always makes me calm down and realize that there are bad days, bad weeks and according to my aunt who has been married over 50 years, there are even sometimes bad years in a marriage. There are so many things around a marriage/wedding that cause stress, but if you have been with this guy for 5 years and have lived with him, you probably know what you are getting yourself into. Can you live without him? If you can’t, then you have nothing to worry about this feeling will pass. Don’t dwell on it! :)

Hope this helped!

<3 The Future Mrs. Ortiz


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bride11 Posts : 8 Registered: 4/23/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: May 8, 2011 9:30 AM Go to message in response to: Soon2BMrsOrtiz1...

Thanks for your input! I really do just need to quit dwelling on everything I guess, it's just tough sometimes =]

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paperdolldoes Posts : 3 Registered: 5/17/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: May 17, 2011 5:26 PM Go to message in response to: bride11

After 5 years, you know what kind of person he is. Do you think you're happier with him than without him, on the whole? Because that's what marriage is. Not a promise that everything will be perfect every day. It's finding someone who, on average, makes your life better than it would be without them. Anxiety notwithstanding, try remembering your life before you were with him, and ask yourself if you're happier now.

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AMcK Posts : 1 Registered: 4/14/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: May 23, 2011 11:44 AM Go to message in response to: bride11

Yes, use your energy to just live your life. You don't have a problem and you don't need a therapist. Be mentally productive by smiling and saying "I don't want to think about negative things right now," and go find something you like to do.

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WellWisher Posts : 175 Registered: 1/2/10
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: May 23, 2011 12:18 PM Go to message in response to: AMcK

Um, AMcK, don't go telling strangers that have already said they have an anxiety disorder not to see a therapist. You haven't even met her, and even if you did you're not in a position to say that.

I'm getting married this summer too and I was really nervous until I realized that I was nervous about the wedding itself, not getting married. One thing that really helped me pinpoint that was journaling. I would write out all of my feelings in a particularly stressful moment, and then I could go back a couple of days later to evaluate those thoughts and feelings.

I suffer from anxiety too (connected to depression) and seeing a therapist really helped me out a lot as well. If these feelings persist I would suggest seeing someone, even if it's just for a few appointments. Once I found a good fit with a therapist (the first one I went to clashed horribly with my personality) and met with him a couple of times, I felt like I had a solid grip on my life for the first time. Now that I have that grip, journaling helps me out a lot, but I still have the security of knowing where I can get help if I need it, and even that makes me feel sooo much better. Good luck with everything!

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mikelandis2 Posts : 1 Registered: 6/22/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Jun 22, 2011 11:33 AM Go to message in response to: bride11

Try meditation.. It helped me clear many, many things on my mind.

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cindygaga Posts : 2 Registered: 7/8/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Jul 8, 2011 5:42 AM Go to message in response to: bride11

I do think there is something wrong.

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nuwan02joysa Posts : 1 Registered: 7/13/11
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Jul 13, 2011 7:18 AM Go to message in response to: cindygaga

hi !!!!!!!!!!!

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wzq103 Posts : 2,771 Registered: 9/11/12
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Sep 11, 2012 2:03 PM Go to message in response to: Aunt

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swichwang34 Posts : 1,473 Registered: 9/13/12
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Sep 13, 2012 9:14 PM Go to message in response to: bride11

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Kimberly212 Posts : 2,211 Registered: 9/12/12
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Sep 27, 2012 10:31 PM Go to message in response to: bride11

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Catherine88 Posts : 740 Registered: 7/26/12
Re: Going crazy, please help me.
Posted: Oct 10, 2012 11:54 PM Go to message in response to: bride11

It seems a little late but I hope you can handle everything calmly.Now,i think your wedding life should be very happy.Keep positive and happy attitude!

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