If he does not ask soon...

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kynda Posts : 2 Registered: 12/21/10
If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Dec 21, 2010 1:19 PM

I may be forced to take matters in to my own hand. Not really, but I was looking for ideas. Has anyone here been the one to actually propose to your hubby, or fiance? I have been thinking about it, and think it could be an interesting idea, especially since my boyfriend has been married before, and has already gotten the chance to ask. I have many questions, including:
How did he take it?
Do you talk to his parents first?
What about a ring? Do I still get one?

Please, any help or stories or anything would be of great help.


auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Dec 21, 2010 3:21 PM Go to message in response to: kynda

Dear Fetta,

Let's consider a happy medium.

Instead of going for a total transexual experience where you pop the question with a diamond ring in your pocket, think about just bringing up the subject to see how he responds.

I didn't have a Big Showy Proposal. We just talked about it more and more, then set a date and went, together, to the jewelry store.

Here is my suggestion. Some time when you are both comfortable and not distracted by other things (TV, kids, work) and you are in a private setting, just say "Where do you see yourself in another 10 years? Another 5 years?"

Then, just listen. If he asks you the same kind of question, then simply respond "One of my personal goals is to go through life married to a wonderful man. I am hoping that will be you."

Then, just sit back and listen.


Beeble Posts : 306 Registered: 11/19/09
Re: If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Dec 21, 2010 3:32 PM Go to message in response to: kynda

Oh I know how you feel. I waited all last year for things to happen and they didn't, little did I know that he had been married before and it was too big of a scar for him to tell me until something drastic came up. I sure know how previous marriage issues can cause men to majorly drag their feet when it comes time to commit again.

Now we have worked through those emotional issues and I'm back to being confident about us. I know my SO has been in jewelery stores recently but as far as I know just looking at things.

I told him to get his ring size and he did and told me so I'm giving it to the new year and if he hasn't asked me after the holidays I'm planning on asking him. I did buy a ring but nothing too expensive as he works at a gym, always dealing with the animals out on the farm, working on his cars etc and he may not wear it much or might damage/lose it. I bought tungsten carbide for strength with a carbon fiber inlay. The only downfall is it can't be resized so I would have to exchange it if it doesn't fit right. He said size 8 but it's a wide band so they said to order 1/2 size bigger. I hope that wasn't a mistake.

If I do ask him, It's not going to be anything elaborate because I'm sure the sentiment would be lost on a boy.


shirley16 Posts : 14 Registered: 1/13/11
Re: If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Jan 23, 2011 1:24 PM Go to message in response to: kynda

@ Beeble

You're right that tungsten bands can't be resized. We're looking at buying him one at http://www.larsonjewelers.com/ and they told us the same thing. Funny you heard you should go a half size up because they told us to go a half size down. Let me know if that works out for you.


PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Jan 23, 2011 1:42 PM Go to message in response to: shirley16

The up or down might have had to do with the season in which you tried on the rings.

Hands tend to shrink in winter and swell in the heat - so if you tried them on in opposite seasons - that may resulted in the contradictory advice. LOL





kakers Posts : 12 Registered: 1/22/11
Re: If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Jan 23, 2011 2:08 PM Go to message in response to: kynda

I can't say that I was antsy for him to ask (we've only been together a year) but I wanted him to get the picture loud and clear that I see myself marrying him. I thought he would be likely to be hesitant to ask as he was engaged before and she had broken it off, so I was thinking if I didn't give him hints he may take forever. I was trying to have my friends drop hints, but he's been out of town (military) so when he was in town a couple weeks ago I just ended up blurting out in one of our "you're mine forever" moments that I just had to make him mine more officially, with a legally binding contract. He got the hint LOL and asked when we were going to do it.

He's planning on talking to my parents before officially popping the question but he is ring shopping :)



wzq103 Posts : 1,190 Registered: 9/11/12
Re: If he does not ask soon...
Posted: Sep 20, 2012 5:13 PM Go to message in response to: kynda

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