Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life

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HamzicBride Posts : 178 Registered: 12/28/09
Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
Posted: Jul 2, 2010 12:46 AM

Hello ladies,
I had to share one special moment I had today. You might want to take a snack for this one, it's a bit long as I wanted to give the little history...and perhaps a box of kleenex as well. The "waiting for the ring portion" is at the end of this post.

I have had a very distant, nearly non-existent relationship with my divorced father of 5 years. I talked to him and saw him for the last time exactly 5 years ago when he with no notice, left our family and re-started his life in a completely different part of the country(long story-our family fell apart and has not gotten back together since). I grew up daddy's girl my entire life but quit all connections with him 5 years ago because of the family situation. It was just to difficult for me to go see him in his new life to then go back home where the rest of us were still trying to put ourselves back together.

I found out 5 months ago that my dad as diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer in July of 2009. Devastating news but unfortunately I still could not get myself to get in contact back with him despite his situation.

I found out 5 days ago that doctors have finally given him a month left to live. My boyfriend along with a few co-workers have pushed me to go talk to him and go say my goodbyes despite some internal battles I was dealing with and what happened 5 years ago. After saying I wouldnt go, my heart told me to go and do it.

I went out 2 days ago to see him for the first time in 5 years. It was the hardest thing I have ever seen, yet the best decision I have ever made. We had dinner and laid everything out on the table, all the things and questions that were left unanswered from 5 years ago were answered, tears were shared, hugs were given, smiles were and hand holding was done. I now regret having been stupid enough to wait until he just had a few weeks left to correct and fix things. Blessed I had a second chance.

A picture of us, his face was swollen from the steroids they put him on for pain control:
http://inlinethumb34.webshots.com/47905/2841261350101961236S500x500Q85.jpg

We found out this morning he had taken a turn for the worst over night and was admitting to hospital this morning into the hospice. They've re-evaluated his condition to a week, possibly 2 left. Was able to take a picture with him on a small hill. Boyfriend had to practically carry him up to the top because he's to weak to walk on his own:

http://inlinethumb63.webshots.com/45502/2276513020101961236S500x500Q85.jpg

This evening while we sad down at dinner with him and my dear boyfriend; while up and gone to the restroom, boyfriend asked his permission for my hand in marriage. Boyfriend said that for a moment he said nothing, as he watched tears slide down his cheeks. He became so emotional he couldn't speak and eventually pulled himself together enough to say yes, and that he couldn't wish for anyone else to marry me.

Boyfriend and I have talked about putting a beautiful frame up with the last picture posted next to the aisle, as he will not be present for our wedding. He's been one outstanding man.

Just wanted to share this truly dear moment in my life. Been thanking God every night to have given me the chance to spend an extra day with him.


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PharmToxGirl Posts : 5,446 Registered: 8/30/07
Re: Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
Posted: Jul 2, 2010 1:43 AM Go to message in response to: HamzicBride

Ham - Oh yeah I teared up. Seriously, I'm often pegged as a b**ch on the boards, but I can get emotional at the drop of the hat.

I also would have been pushing you to meet with your Dad - I do have friends who I would not push to do that in their position, but from what you said it seemed like a good idea.

Just hold that memory close - I'm sure you will.

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Dani303 Posts : 18 Registered: 6/3/10
Re: Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
Posted: Jul 2, 2010 3:25 AM Go to message in response to: HamzicBride

im really glad you got to spend some special moments with your dad....dont feel guilty...im sure that you two meet up when it was the best time for you and the rest of your family. it sucks that he only has a short time left but im sure it provided him so much more clarity to be able to answer your questions better.

its so awesome that your man got his permission..im sure now he knows you will be happy for the rest of your life :)

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VšnTillBruden Posts : 353 Registered: 1/16/10
Re: Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
Posted: Jul 8, 2010 10:30 AM Go to message in response to: HamzicBride

As a girl who has had a very (and I mean VERY) rough relationship with my father, and am now proud to call myself a Daddy's Girl, those two pictures just made me sob like a child with a skinned knee.

Ham, I am so proud you went to go and see your father. Don't regret that it took so long to get to that point. Just rejoice that you saw him, period.

Sending a huge mental hug your way! Your boyfriend sounds like the sweetest man in the world.

Love me when I least deserve it, because that is when I need it the most. (Swedish proverb)

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HamzicBride Posts : 178 Registered: 12/28/09
Re: Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
Posted: Jul 8, 2010 3:46 PM Go to message in response to: VšnTillBruden

Thank you so much :) your last response made me cry! good happy tears though. thank you for all the kind comments. It's been a long week and going to continue to be a bit of a long couple more to go. Every day I go out is considered a bonus day to me. Always afraid of the day i will get that phone call though. Again very blessed I had the second chance to fix this before it was to late.

Thanks again for all the hugs and prayers. really appreciated,

Hugs all around.


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Kimberly212 Posts : 972 Registered: 9/12/12
Re: Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
Posted: Sep 19, 2012 8:31 PM Go to message in response to: HamzicBride

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Kimberly212 Posts : 972 Registered: 9/12/12
Re: Pretty special moment with the best 2 men of my life
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