At least she is getting to wear it again! By the time I hit thirty I felt like that chick in that movie about all the bridesmaid's dresses. I have a sh*tload of satin throw pillows now :)
I think my biggest "issue" would be that it was something that was for MY wedding and now you want to "steal my ideas" and use them in YOUR wedding. I get it. We all want our wedding to be super unique and super special. I think that's probably why they were tip-toeing around the subject. I would shake it off and be flattered that another bride admires your taste so much that she wants to copy it.
After all, it has been said that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.