October 2010 Brides

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HollyD Posts : 81 Registered: 7/20/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 9:10 AM Go to message in response to: annarebeccal

OK ladies-I have a etiquette question that I would like your opinion on. I know that etiquette states that a cash bar is cheap and tacky (where I am from they are pretty standard). The original venue for our reception had a bar and we were going to pay for the beer (what most would drink). We have since changed our venue from that one to one that has NO bar at all. The new place does allow alcohol they just don't provide any. Keep in mind that our venue is used constantly for wedding receptions and this is a fairly small town, meaning most of our guests know that there is no bar. Anywho, the point to this is that we were not planning on providing any alcohol at our reception. Our friends have already discussed bringing their own beer and whatnot out to the venue (which is acceptable at the venue) and alot of other guests will most likely do the same. My question is- is this tacky? It is fairly normal standards here but I want others opinions. I guess the point is that even though we are not providing any alcohol that guests can bring something to drink if they choose too, we aren't going to tell them that they can't. I am a hard time deciding if we are being tacky or not. FI has mentioned getting a keg of beer but he really hasn't decided yet, because he doesn't want anyone getting REALLY trashed. Don't know what to do and would really appreciate your opinions and ideas!
Thanks!

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TheeBride Posts : 130 Registered: 1/17/10
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 9:59 AM Go to message in response to: HollyD

You said, "The original venue for our reception had a bar and we were going to pay for the beer (what most would drink)" then said about the new venue, "Anywho, the point to this is that we were not planning on providing any alcohol at our reception".....soooooo, I'm confused. Did you only want to provide beer if you were having it at the first venue? I've been to weddings where there's no bar, beer/wine provided, open bar and cash bar but I've never been to one where the guests bring their own. Having people walk around with cans or bottles of beer sounds a little tacky to me, just my opinion though. What I would probably do is buy a keg and find/pay someone to bartend. You could get clear platic cups if you want (hey, it looks better than a 10oz Coors or whatever, lol) and see if you can hire a local bartender to help you...they'll make tips so it's not like you have to pay 'too' much. Or, if your budget allows see if you can find a company to bartend for you.

To prevent people from getting TRASHED, I recommend having the bar open for a certain time...not the for entire reception and don't serve liquor. Plus, you could always have the bartender (or whoever is in charge of the keg) cut people off or serve a certain amount per guest. I dunno, good luck!

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greenandblack Posts : 44 Registered: 12/10/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 12:15 PM Go to message in response to: TheeBride

We are paying for beer and wine(not many folks will drink wine tho) then after 500.00 of hard drinks they pay for it themself.....ITS A WEDDING dont worry hopefully they will be having so much will never say anything if yall go lil cheaper i say most everyone drinks beer so its all good !!!!!!!

The way iam saving is i got soOOOOOo lucky and where am having my wedding reception at a old movie theater where no ones has ever had theres until now so everyone wants to be part of it i got a great deal ON ALOT of stuff like the photobooth ,flowers,cake and a few more things also ive gonna almost everything off online i got a invites from this place http://www.handykaneweddings.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=browse&id=202849&pageid=22 its in the movie theme then iam doubling my photobooth pics as what they get with our name and dates at the bottoms as my favors and i got a 2 for 1 to rent the popcorn and cotton candy makers......so iam doing good




 

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dodgercpkl Posts : 130 Registered: 9/27/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 12:48 PM Go to message in response to: HollyD

Anton and I don't drink and have decided not to have the extra expense of paying for liquor for anyone else. So I don't think it would be tacky if you chose not to provide it. If your venue allows them to bring their own and they choose to, that would be their choice imo and not you asking them to bring their own ya know?

I think the etiquette thing comes in with having a cash bar or asking people to bring their own.


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HollyD Posts : 81 Registered: 7/20/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 12:53 PM Go to message in response to: TheeBride

Let me try to explain a little clearer! lol The first venue had a bar, we would have paid for a keg there. We have now switched venues. The new venue has NO bar whatsoever. Therefore we won't be serving ANY alcohol. If someone wants to drink (most people in our town know this already about the venue) they CAN bring in alcohol if they choose too. Several of our friends have already been discussing what they are bringing to drink. In the course of those discussions, FI has mentioned buying a keg for those who want to drink beer (most will). We went to a wedding reception at the same place just a couple of months ago. We stopped at the store before going out there and got what we wanted to drink. We didn't think anything of it. Anyway,I just wanted to post about it to maybe get other suggestions or ideas. Thanks for any help!

I think that I should add that even if we provide beer at our reception, our friends and family are aware of the venue. Guests will still most likely bring their own alcohol if they are wanting something special, no matter what. However, I will talk to FI a little more about getting a keg.

Thanks Dodger! I appreciate your response. We WILL NOT tell our guests that they have to bring their own drinks, but if they choose to, then I am not going to stop them.

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RebeccaFazzio Posts : 323 Registered: 10/28/07
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 1:40 PM Go to message in response to: HollyD

Holly-

I think because it is pretty standard where you're having your reception that it isn't tacky for people to BYOB. I think it would be nice to provide at least one keg and maybe have someone work it for people so they aren't doing it themselves because that will probably result in a spill. Also, please no keg stands!

My reception hall has a full bar and it is stocked with middle of the shelf alcohol (it's also open) but they told us if we wanted to bring in some different stuff we definately could. Like my FFIL only drinks a certain type of beer which they don't offer so we're going to bring in a case of those just for him. We are also going to bring in a nice bottle of whiskey for just the groomsmen.

Ladies-

Have any of you started doing shower planning yet? Two of my bridesmaids are throwing my shower in my home town and we have decided on a tea party theme complete with sundresses and hats! We are getting together later today to go over menu, decorations, drinks, ect.
27000_357855012861_529642861_3534868_1049818_n

To love another person is to see the face of God.

http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/RebeccaIngram&ScottFazzio

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TheeBride Posts : 130 Registered: 1/17/10
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 3:48 PM Go to message in response to: HollyD

LOL I got what you were saying about switching venues and the new one not having a bar at all. Maybe it's just different for where we live but I know there's venue's around here without bars and people will hire someone to bartend..meaning, the bartender (or company they work for) will provide a makeshift bar where you can keep the keg behind and have that person pour for you. This way, you don't have guests that don't know how to use a keg making a mess, you don't have guests going back over and over and over again getting trashed and you have someone that sort of responsible for the alcohol...set up, distribution and clean up.

That said, every place in every town is different...if everyone already knows about this venue I say just let it ride. If it's not a very formal event, let 'em walk around with their drinks and if it is maybe provide some type of cup for them to use (which might help if anything gets dropped by accident...like a glass bottle).

I agree with Dodger, don't tell them they can bring their own...let word spread on its own.

Have fun and good luck! You're getting married, woohooo!!!!!!! :o)


"I carry your heart with me, I carry it in
my heart. I am never without it, anywhere
I go you go, my dear..."

E.E. Cummings

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agd1017 Posts : 464 Registered: 9/14/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 4:21 PM Go to message in response to: RebeccaFazzio

Holly- I think if it's normal in your area, then most people wouldn't think it's tacky. Go for it.

Rebecca- I haven't heard anything about my shower. My FSIL is my MOH and I know awhile back she was reading a book about being a bridesmaid, and taking notes. Now that we've decided to get married in Vegas, I don't know if she's still planning on doing a shower or not.

As for me, I'm just waiting to hear back from the Nevada Parks department about whether the area we want to get married at is available at the time we want to get married. If not, we'll just do it another time that day.

My FMIL and my FH's aunt are planning some sort of reception I think. FMIL has mentioned it off and on. I think they were looking into some sort of meeting room at a hotel or something like that, I'm not sure. Maybe at a restaurant. Honestly, when we decided to move the wedding to Las Vegas, Eric and I decided we probably wouldn't even have a regular reception. Our plan was to have the ceremony, go out to a nice lunch with everybody, and then that night we'd go out with all our friends and whoever else wanted to go, to the casinos and clubs. So their reception idea is fine with us, as long as they plan it. lol

Amanda and Eric
10/10/10

Amanda and Eric

 

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annarebeccal Posts : 70 Registered: 7/21/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 4:26 PM Go to message in response to: RebeccaFazzio

i keep finding really cute bridal shower ideas online and i would love to help plan one with my bridesmaids. I know my sister wants to throw one for me in california some time. and my mom will probably want to throw me one (right?) but i kind of just want to have one with friends and/or co workers. do you think it would be ok to ask my brides maids to throw one or should i wait and see what they decide to do?
 

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RebeccaFazzio Posts : 323 Registered: 10/28/07
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 6:56 PM Go to message in response to: annarebeccal

I don't feel like you should ask someone to plan your shower. I know a lot of people feel like that is rude but i would definately drop hints and hope someone picks up on them. If they don't then you don't get a shower. I know most older people feel like if your mom or a relative throws the shower for you it seems like your asking for gifts so maybe think about that as well.

My situation is a little odd because my grandmother is my MOH and wants to fufill her duties by throwing me a shower so she and one of my other BM's are hosting it. I don't feel as bad about it because it isn't just my grandmother hosting the shower. I'm lucky enough that I get to be there along the way to help plan it.

My FMIL is throwing me a shower in New Orleans that I have no clue what is going on there. I know it's being held at a restaurant and the menu (which I don't care for) but that's it.
27000_357855012861_529642861_3534868_1049818_n

To love another person is to see the face of God.

http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/RebeccaIngram&ScottFazzio

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HollyD Posts : 81 Registered: 7/20/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 10, 2010 10:59 PM Go to message in response to: RebeccaFazzio

TheeBride-It would be cool to have a bartender with a makeshift bar! However, I can guarantee that there is nothing like that around here. I haven't ever heard of that being done before. I guess you really do learn something everyday! lol

Rebecca-I think that having your grandma as your MOH is the absolute sweetest thing that I have ever heard! I started to tear up when I read that!

My news on a bridal shower. I told my MOH and BM's that I did not want a shower. I guess I just feel like we have lived together for 3 years now and that having a shower at this point was kind of like a gift grab. Well, a women that goes to church with and is good friends with FIL's and whom I have known for years and years (her sister's in law are my 2 best friends one is my MOH and the other a BM) came up to me the other day. She asked me if they (BF's) were planning a shower for me, and I told her no. She then told me "well, I want to have one for you". I was shocked and speechless to say the least. I thought that it is very sweet of her. Apparently, after talking to FMIL, she told FMIL that she would have a shower for me a few weeks ago. She told me "just a little get together at the church". :) Well, I suppose now that even though I didn't want one I am getting one anyway! lol

BTW- The tea party themed is fantastic!

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FutureMrsSimpki... Posts : 45 Registered: 1/7/10
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 11, 2010 12:02 PM Go to message in response to: HollyD

We're having a cash bar that has wine, liquor and beer. It isn't tacky where we live and I wasn't going to fork out 7,000 dollars for an open bar. We just ordered our invitations and they will be here on Thursday. We pretty much have everything done until August when we get a count of how many guests will be coming. I can't believe we have 5 months left until October. My MOH is throwing me a bridal shower and I'm excited because I don't have to plan it. Haha We're only inviting about 40 people to the shower and that will be in August. The only thing I have left to do is find a good Florist. I went to a few but they seem old fashion and I want something up to date.

Hope all the planning is going well with everyone! :)

 ♥ been engaged since http://o1.11.o9 ♥

"This day I will marry my friend, the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love." ♥


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Soon2BMrsCollins Posts : 54 Registered: 12/17/08
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 11, 2010 4:58 PM Go to message in response to: Rchelle

Hey Rchelle! I hope the semester went well. Work has been kicking my butt so I have not done very much planning. But I'm actually ready to just walk down the aisle right here and now.

I had all my bridesmaids come over to help me assemble the invitations ... well me being the genius that I am forgot to get stamps fro the RSVP envelopes .... yeap sooooooo I have to go back through each one of them and add a stamp .... the good news is that I finally bought the stamps.

Have you started thinking about favors? I really want to do a candy buffet and a smore's station :) yum.
Visit Our Wedding Website: www.tiffaniandreco.com

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CheetahAngel Posts : 2,017 Registered: 11/29/08
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 11, 2010 7:09 PM Go to message in response to: Soon2BMrsCollins

My bridesmaid finally ordered her dress!! Not sure if you all remembered how stressed I was that she didn't order her dress when the other girls ordered their dressses and I was afraid the color would be discontinued. Well I dont have to worry about that now :)

I am done with school until the fall! (Im taking one class in the fall). I have been sooo stressed with trying to get into the counseling graduate program at school and about my grades that I put the wedding planning on hold. But now that I am done with school I can start up again. I feel like all you ladies are ahead of me lol. We all only have about 5 months to go! AHH. Time is going so fast! :)

 

                           
                                          CIMG7482-1.jpg picture by CheetahAngel81

 

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greenandblack Posts : 44 Registered: 12/10/09
Re: October 2010 Brides
Posted: May 13, 2010 6:16 PM Go to message in response to: CheetahAngel

Rhinestone Ribbon Headband In Champagne where r some good places online to look at?????My dress is champagne and i really wanna to wear that it my hair ...............ALSO where has everyone got there flower girl dresses at iam stuck i don't wanna do more then 65 on it?????



 

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