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Honeymoon issues

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chfsgrl Posts : 36 Registered: 1/6/10
Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 11, 2010 2:37 PM

My FH and I are thinking of waiting on a honeymoon until this summer, mainly because of finances. My issue is that I dont want to wait...in my eyes a honeymoon happens directly after the wedding (or the next day at latest). Thisis my first marraige and his second...is it selfish of me to want at least some sort of honeymoon or "getaway" after we say I DO? Nothing major...Im not talking a week in the bahamas or anything...just a couple of nights away. Help?

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new_jersey , march_2010
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Mrslinnben Posts : 2,286 Registered: 6/4/07
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 11, 2010 4:21 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

We had a 2 part honeymoon because of work & money issues. The week after our wedding we did 4 days in NYC, then 3 mos later we went to Maine for 5 days. It totally worked for us!

upstate_hudson_valley , april_2007 , new_jersey , march_2010
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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 11, 2010 9:20 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

Daer CHF,

".is it selfish of me to want at least some sort of honeymoon or "getaway" after we say I DO"

It's not at all selfish. However, sometimes things are just not logisitically possible.

I have a friend who absolutely, positively had to go to work the day after she got married. Sure they would have liked to go on a honeymoon immediately. It was simply impossible.

So? She sucked it up and went to work the next day. Later, they went to Aruba for a nice honeymoon.

This is between you and your new husband. You need to work it out, somehow, with him. Do the best you can, then let it go.

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FrancieElaine Posts : 655 Registered: 6/26/09
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 11, 2010 9:35 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

I absolutely think you should have a honeymoon! There is nothing wrong with wanting that.. and it doesn't have to be a trip to a tropical island. But after all the stress of the wedding... a couple of days alone will be much needed and very much deserved!

Francie Elaine, The Bride Whisperer

www.bride-whisperer.com

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new_jersey , march_2010 , north_carolina
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CheetahAngel Posts : 2,017 Registered: 11/29/08
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 11, 2010 9:54 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

You're not being selfish at all. A lot of newly married couples can't afford a honeymoon right after the wedding or work schedules are conflicting, so instead what they do is take a weekend getaway somewhere close by. Like Francie said time to relax is important after the wedding. Even if it's just a night away is fine. Then when the both of you save up money you can take the vacation of your dreams ;)
                           
  

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new_jersey , march_2010 , connecticut , october_2010
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CatStandish Posts : 2,767 Registered: 6/20/08
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 12, 2010 8:12 AM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

Can you afford maybe to reserve a night (or two) in one of the nicer hotels in your area? Then you're not going all out on gas, but you still get a special retreat together. If not one of the nicer ones, can you afford a couple of nights at a nice hotel (by definition....I'm thinking of "nicer" as being one of the uber ritzy ones in the area...for us it is the Renaissance. But NICE would be the Springhill Marriott)

Then you sort of get a little compromise while you save for the big shindig.

No, you're not being selfish for wanting this.

Misty

new_jersey , march_2010 , september_2009
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chfsgrl Posts : 36 Registered: 1/6/10
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 12, 2010 9:59 AM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

I talked to my FH last night about booking a hotel that is about 1.5 hours from our house, just for a couple of nights. My main reasons for choosing this hotel was because it's absolutely beautiful, nice a secluded and the LT GEN at his work is friends with the owner...We had the company Christmas Lunch there and I fell in love with it. He is going to mention it to the GEN and see what we can do.

Another issue for us (me really) is that we have two very young boys and I hate leaving them. So maybe this summer we can take a "family honeymoon" to the Shore for a few more days.

Thanks everyone for your input.

Here is the link to the hotel, tell me what you think.

http://www.thenationalhotelnj.com/hotelphotos.aspx


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new_jersey , march_2010
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JerseyGirlVA Posts : 311 Registered: 9/17/09
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 12, 2010 3:29 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

That is a great resolution! You'll definitely want a few nights to spend QT with your FH after the wedding. I'm sure it will be difficult to leave your boys for a few nights but trust me, you'll enjoy every quiet relaxing moment once you're at the hotel! Hopefully GEN can get you a discounted rate that wont break the bank =)

new_jersey , march_2010
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rekk1986 Posts : 4 Registered: 1/7/10
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 12, 2010 8:12 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

I think you should sastify your FH, just take the first week of honeymoon near the place you are living.and then you can arrange a honeymoon trip that you want , by this way i think your FH is very happy. Regard

new_jersey , march_2010 , alaska , january_2008
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NJ4Life Posts : 3,358 Registered: 8/10/07
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 4:12 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

Oh wow, i LOVE Frenchtown!! It's so cute and there are so many small towns up and down the delaware in PA and NJ in that area. Definitely check out New Hope, PA. Its about 25 mins south of Frenchtown over the river!

New Jersey: We have dumps, bays and cement boots and we know how to use 'em

new_jersey , march_2010 , october_2008 , central_new_jersey
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chfsgrl Posts : 36 Registered: 1/6/10
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 8:25 PM Go to message in response to: NJ4Life

NJ-Frenchtown is beautiful. We have been up there several times but have never made it to New Hope which we are hoping to do this time.

Thanks everyone for replying!!


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new_jersey , march_2010 , october_2008 , central_new_jersey
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chfsgrl Posts : 36 Registered: 1/6/10
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 13, 2010 8:29 PM Go to message in response to: rekk1986

I think you should sastify your FH, just take the first week of
honeymoon near the place you are living.and then you can arrange a
honeymoon trip that you want , by this way i think your FH is very
happy. Regard

Im not entirely sure what you mean by "satisfy my FH" the issue lyes with both of us not wanting to spend too much money. I know it will come down to him telling me that going away for the weekend is fine because we deserve that. I wasn't wondering if I was being selfish about going against what he wanted or didnt want...I was wondering if I was being selfish money wise. Hope this clears things up...




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new_jersey , march_2010 , alaska , january_2008
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auntofthebride Posts : 9,357 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 14, 2010 7:16 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

Dear CHF,

There's nothing wrong with a newlywed, or even long-time married, couple going for a weekend away. Get some quality babysitting for the kids, then go away and relax after the wedding. A couple of nights would be fine. Just de-stress a bit.

Later, when you have more time, plan that family vacation. You might consider particularly looking for a place with supervised, safe stuff for the kids. That means you and your husband will have some "honeymoon" time, knowing that the kids are safe and gainfully occupied.

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jackson132 Posts : 1,662 Registered: 9/13/12
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Dec 24, 2012 1:18 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

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Uberoom1 Posts : 33 Registered: 12/10/12
Re: Honeymoon issues
Posted: Jan 14, 2013 4:35 PM Go to message in response to: chfsgrl

Hello,

You can plan your honeymoon, surprise him by booking a room in a nice resort and order a honeymoon room decoration to add romanticism, don't wait for him to ask, do it yourself. You both will have a great time.

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