When do I begin to plan?

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dixielovinbabe Posts : 6 Registered: 12/22/06
When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 10, 2009 12:36 AM

My fiance and I have set our wedding date for July 4, 2011. However, he is in the Navy and will be leaving in January which will leave me to do everything here by myself. Most of my family is telling me not to worry about it and to wait. I dont want him to feel left out of the planning though because he is gone. What do I do?

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auntofthebride Posts : 9,354 Registered: 4/2/06
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 10, 2009 10:49 AM Go to message in response to: dixielovinbabe

dear DLB,

There are two stages in planning. The first is gathering ideas and seeing how they fit in with a budget. The second stage is actually committing to various vendors, buying clothing, etc.

My suggestion to you is to focus on gathering ideas at this point. Get a loose-leaf notebook and some pocket folder inserts. When you see something you like, tear the page out of the magazine or take a digital photo. Then, as you see more things, eliminate those that you really don't like that much any more.

Your notebook should have dividers for the different decision points: Flowers. Photography. Dress. Bridesmaids. etc.

Get a lot of ideas, look at "real" prices and get a handle on how much you have to spend. You can do that without making a single deposit nor legal committment.

When the time comes to put the cash on the barrelhead, you'll have a very good idea of what you want.

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Jane0605 Posts : 14 Registered: 10/1/09
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 10, 2009 9:20 PM Go to message in response to: dixielovinbabe

At the site I bought my sand ceremony set at had a great artical about starting your wedding plain, here is the link... http://www.weddinglighthouse.com/index.php?p=1_10_5-Steps-to-Start-Planning

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rocky5 Posts : 23 Registered: 7/16/09
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 12, 2009 12:16 AM Go to message in response to: dixielovinbabe

i'm in the same exact boat as you. my fiance is in the military and he has been gone the entire time i've been planning the wedding. in my experience, the guy really doesn't care all that much about what you decide on or pick out, etc. and i know that really upsets some girls, and yes it can get aggravating, but sometimes its just easier to be able to decide on everything yourself. what i did was i asked him what he had in mind for places like the church we wanted to get married in, what he wanted the reception to be like, etc. and sent him websites so he could check out everything himself. then, if he liked everything i would go with it. as for the details, like flowers and things, i can almost guarantee you he'll want to leave it all up to you anyway. also, i wouldn't wait too long to start planning. i know it seems like its far away now, but i started planning almost as soon as i got engaged (in dec. 2008), and got all the major things out of the way and am soooo happy i did. its made my life a lot easier now that the wedding is almost right around the corner and i don't have to deal with all of that.

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dixielovinbabe Posts : 6 Registered: 12/22/06
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 12, 2009 10:42 AM Go to message in response to: rocky5

Thank you very much for your help. The only problem I really have now is where to have the wedding and when. We want it at a beach but we don't have one close enough to look at and we cant both take off work to go look before he leaves. The internet is the only way we have right now to look. I just wondrer how reliable the sites are. July 4 is what we want but no guarantee, so is it ok to go ahead and reserve the date and place we decide?

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rocky5 Posts : 23 Registered: 7/16/09
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 12, 2009 11:15 AM Go to message in response to: dixielovinbabe

i would look on the internet for places with him and then after he leaves, since he won't have time to go with you, look at all of the places you guys liked in person by yourself. you'll definitely want to see everything in person before you ultimately decide. and then let him know what you thought of everything and book it.

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MyBridalCenter Posts : 13 Registered: 10/12/09
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 12, 2009 11:55 PM Go to message in response to: dixielovinbabe

First of all, congratulations on your engagement!! You can never start planning too early.
Now, that doesn't mean you have to have the whole thing planned out in
the next few months, but if I were you, I would make a list of all the
items and services I need, and try to tackle a couple each month or so
just to get a head start. That way, you will pretty much be assured
that you won't be scrambling for stuff once the actual date starts
approaching in a couple years. As a side note, depending on the
location you choose for you reception and ceremony, some places sell
out certain dates years in advance, so that may be one of the first
things you start narrowing down.

My Bridal Center - For all your wedding needs.

http://www.mybridalcenter.com

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cmoynihan1011 Posts : 5 Registered: 8/6/09
Re: When do I begin to plan?
Posted: Oct 18, 2009 8:17 PM Go to message in response to: dixielovinbabe

We're getting married that same weekend, just on July 2nd and we're planning ours for Hawaii, which was chosen because we have people coming from the states and from Australia, where all his family is. People here, mainly my family, have been chiding me for planning so soon, however his family is greatful to know some of the details (I've already picked the hotel) well in advance so they have an idea of how much to save and will be able to plan accordingly.

You don't necessarily have to have all the details right off the bat, but some people will be greatful to have an idea. Others, however, will give you grief for 'jumping the gun.'

We started planning ahead because we knew it wouldn't be easy for people to find out the details on even just 6 months notice and be able to attend. However, as a result, my family refuses to help me plan until the date is closer because they think it's ridiculous to plan so far in advance.

Just remember, it's YOUR wedding, not theirs. If there is one time you're allowed to be a little selfish, it's for this day.

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