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honoring a family member

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jenmovdob Posts : 18 Registered: 3/13/07

honoring a family member: Posted: Jun 19, 2007 3:37 PM; Hey. My great Aunt (my grandmother's twin) is currently in the hospital on life support. The docs said yesterday that there is nothing they can do. Her son made the decision to pull the plug this coming weekend. My wedding is in 11 days. That means there will be a funeral just a few days before the wedding. What is the appropriate way to honor her without making the wedding a downer? Do I have my officient say a few words? Any help would be great.

june_2007

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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,593 Registered: 7/2/06

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jun 19, 2007 5:25 PM Go to message in response to: jenmovdob; Hi. Im really sorry this is happening in your family, that truly sucks. Are youclose with your Great Aunt? I think how you want to honor her depends on that, at least a little bit. There are several things you can do.
At my wedding, we gave our officiant a list of any immediate family members who had passed on on both sides, and he said a litlte something ..a poem about life and death..and read their names, saying they had blessed this union and were all here in spirit. It was really nice, short, and not too sad..just really heartfelt. So yes, you can have your officiant say a little something if you wish.
Another thing you can do is put a dedication to her in your program if you like. Or just somewhere , maybe at the end on the back page, a short thought or sentence "On this day that we celebrate the beginning of our new life together, we think of our Aunt Grace and how much we loved her."
You could also have your DJ play a song at the reception in honor of her ..doesnt even have to be a sad song, maybe just something she loved that everyone could dance to. A nice moment of celebration and acknowledgement in honor of someone that you love.
Some people like to carry a picture of the person inside their bouqet, or place a picture of them somewhere inside the ceremony or reception room. These things are all just different ways to go about the same idea: honoring a loved one. They are all sincere and effective, just pick and choose what feels right for you to do.

Kelley Lynn:)

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jenmovdob Posts : 18 Registered: 3/13/07

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jun 20, 2007 1:21 PM Go to message in response to: kelleyiskelley; Thanks. I really appreciate the help :)

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EveT2007 Posts : 1,947 Registered: 8/31/06

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jun 20, 2007 1:43 PM Go to message in response to: jenmovdob; Wow, I am really impressed with the lovely suggestions Kelly Lynn gave you. I don't have anything to add, I just wanted to express my sympathy. Best wishes for a beautiful wedding and lasting happiness!
Eve T

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kelleyiskelley Posts : 11,593 Registered: 7/2/06

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jun 20, 2007 5:16 PM Go to message in response to: jenmovdob; You are very welcome. Im happy to help. :)
Music is really powerful as a tribute to honor someone. If you can find out her favorite song or style of music she loved, it might be nice to simply play it at the reception and the DJ can have everyone get on the dance floor in her honor.:)

Kelley Lynn:)

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Guest

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jun 20, 2007 6:56 PM Go to message in response to: jenmovdob; At my first wedding I had a letter that my Dad wrote me when I was 3 years old, we placed that on the cake table. Next to the table I had a poster board with a bunch of pictures of me with him throughout the years of growing up. It was very lovely and touching.
If you don't have a letter you can always frame a poem (one you write or one you find) and place that on the cake or gift table.

11.11.07 I marry my best friend. Who said all angels are in heaven?

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copanthecat Posts : 1 Registered: 12/1/07

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jul 8, 2009 9:48 AM Go to message in response to: Guest; My father passed a few years ago and one of the nicest suggestions I have found is to place a flower of the same type that is in your bouquet on an empty seat to recognize their absense without drawing too much attention to it.

massachusetts , 2009 , october_11

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tashalynn Posts : 22 Registered: 1/31/07

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Jul 8, 2009 5:27 PM Go to message in response to: copanthecat; For my friend's wedding they had a similar situation. The grooms brother passed away only a month or so before the wedding. They had a picture of him up by the alter and when the groom came out, he lit a candle that was placed by the picture. It was quite a tear-jerker, however, the once the ceremony started, the focus was the bride and the groom and their union. The moment they took to recognize his lost brother did not put a damper on the day and I felt it was totally appropriate. If you do not want to put such focus on her passing in fear that it will put a damper on your wedding day, just simply place a lit candle with her name on it, or something of that nature. I hope that helped! Good luck!

massachusetts , 2009 , october_11

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Kimberly212 Posts : 2,211 Registered: 9/12/12

Re: honoring a family member: Posted: Sep 22, 2012 3:58 AM Go to message in response to: jenmovdob; A-line Gold Strapless Sweetheart Layered Sequin Short Prom Dress
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