First time sex on honeymoon

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madlyinlove09 Posts : 2 Registered: 2/18/08
First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Feb 18, 2008 7:28 PM

My fiancé and I have both been waiting to find the special person to sleep with for the first time.  Neither of us have had sex and to be honest, I am a little scared.  I know it is going to be a wonderful experience, but I am worried about the pain and healing time.  A honeymoon is generally portrayed as this week long of the release of marriage and sex, but if it is my first time doing this, will I be able to enjoy the week?  And also, how many times does it take to where sex is enjoyable and not painful?  

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Kat78 Posts : 189 Registered: 2/9/08
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Feb 18, 2008 8:37 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

well i know when i lost mine it did hurt and it took a few time after that for it not to hurt and now OMG it is the best thing in the world

i say take your time take it slow and if it hurts too much tell him to stop and try later


 When is my wedding

"say i love you today cuz tomorrow you may not have the chance"

http://www.mywedding.com/jonathanandkathleenforever

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Jade1107 Posts : 205 Registered: 9/1/07
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Feb 18, 2008 8:40 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

I'm fairly sure there are other posts about this subject so you may want to search the boards and see what you find. 

Likely, if you've never had sex before, it may hurt. My best advice would be to use lots of lube to ensure a smooth insertion. Also, be sure that he stimulates you to or close to orgasm before you have intercourse. Chances are, if you have an orgasm, you'll be nice and slick when it's his turn. 

Another idea would be to invest in a vibrator - you could try this out before you have sex. This may make insertion easier for you (ie. less painful!).

Just take things super slow and enjoy your night. Tell him if it's painful and make adjustments. Likely it'll be slightly awkward but don't worry! You have an entire week (and marriage) to get it right! It's a learning experience so enjoy it! 

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vlovely Posts : 14 Registered: 1/15/07
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Feb 29, 2008 6:10 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

I'm right there with you! Because of our relationship with Christ, we have chosen to stay pure until our marriage night. Let me tell you, there is nothing more beautiful in this world than two virgins on their wedding night!

Anyway, I have heard that yes, it may be a bit painful. But, I truly believe that it is very mental with a woman. I think that waiting for your husband is very different than doing it before marriage (regardless of what ANYONE says) and that it will be very different mentally for you. Everyone I have spoken with has said the same thing. You are fully ready and you have nothing to truly worry about because you are with your husband. No worries of what you look like (though, of course, we want to look stunning!) or whether or not he loves you, of course he does!!

I am soo happy to hear there is someone else that has waited! It's such a beautiful thing and rare because of what our society tells us! Waiting is truly God's protection for us (especially as women, its a very emotional thing).

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EveT2007 Posts : 1,949 Registered: 8/31/06
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Feb 29, 2008 6:22 PM Go to message in response to: vlovely

Hi, I really respect and applaud you and your FH for waiting.  Are you familiar with the book Our Bodies, Ourselves?  You will find some good woman-to-woman advice there.  There are other similar books on the market too.  The PPs advice about lubrication is good.

Something else I would encourage you to be careful about is the possibility of getting a bladder or yeast infection.  These are certainly not "sexually transmitted diseases," but some women are susceptible to them after sex and they could really put a damper on your honeymoon.  The precautions include urinating before and after sex (within, say 1/2 hr -- you don't have to interrupt the proceedings to run to the potty) and possibly rinsing the vulva area with plain lukewarm water after sex.  You can do this sitting on "the seat" and slouching so that your crotch is angled forward; pour the water onto your crotch from a paper or plastic cup.  It will rinse away some of the seminal fluid, which in some women can change the pH of your natural secretions allowing yeast to flourish. 

Naturally it is also a good idea for your hubby to practice good hygiene -- if he uses an over-the-counter antifungal powder of the type recommended for "jock itch," this could reduce your risk of a yeast infection.

Blessings on your marriage!


EveT

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08divabride Posts : 831 Registered: 11/17/07
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Feb 29, 2008 6:50 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

First of all let me say that I commend you AND your FH for waiting!  You are definitely worthy.  There is nothing to be afraid of.  The first time it will hurt.  The next couple of times will be a snug fit, then you will be just fine.  By then you should be ready to let loose!!!  Yes honeymoons are portrayed as you mentioned, but guess what?  You have the rest of your lives together to get it right!  God bless you and your marriage and may I ask when is the big day?

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madlyinlove09 Posts : 2 Registered: 2/18/08
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 5, 2008 10:46 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

Thank you all so much for your help!  I appreciate it so much!  I respect all of your views and thank you all for your opinions.  I know it will be wonderful and I guess it's just natural that I'm a little nervous.  Oh, and we still have a little over a year, because we're getting married summer '09.  Thank you for asking!

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Wunderbride Posts : 41 Registered: 1/17/08
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 14, 2008 9:06 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

Yea!!! I'm not the only one and I'm proud of it.  My fiance and I are waiting as well and I too am scared.  I can't believe that in 3 and half months I'll be sleeping with a boy.  OMG!  But ya it can be scary when you think about it but I always try to remember that it is a beautiful thing created by God intended for marriage only.  Try not to think of painful things about sex but also think about the beautiful things like growing closer intimately with your husband. Thats a true blessing.
I'd rather die like Christ than live unholy.

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Guest
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 16, 2008 11:55 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

I too am a virgin bride, but more scared about the premarital physical than I am about first time sex.

Can anyone advise me on how to get birth control pills without having a premarital physical? My doctor (and most doctors it seems) require a complete pelvic and vaginal physical to begin contraceptives.I have gone to great lengths to keep my hymen in tact and don't want it to be broken by a doctor. I don't want to use a condom on my first time since I'm already scared about the pain. Can anyone advise me? I'm considering calling a planned parenthood clinic because all the doctors I've consulted with require, without exception, the complete exam.

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Guest
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 25, 2008 8:16 PM Go to message in response to: madlyinlove09

check out my post in friends, family and guests. Its titled "Wedding Night Lingerie"

I am also a first-timer and the girls have posted lots of great advice on there in a very blunt, honest fashion! ENJOY! 

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NewMrsSass Posts : 722 Registered: 12/31/06
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 25, 2008 8:51 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Ever use a tampon? Ever ride a bike?  Your hymen may already be broken.  In reality, many women don't even have "hymen"!  And no, you cannot (and SHOULD NOT) get oral contraceptives without a COMPLETE pelvic exam.  Don't bother calling around.  Any "doctor" who will give you birth control without a complete exam is a quack and should not be trusted.  If this was not necessary, you could just walk into any drug store and buy birth control like it was Tylenol.  Your health should be much higher in your sexual priorities than your hymen.  This is 2008...we know much much much more about female reproductive health than ever before, and if your husband is "requiring" an intact hymen or something ridiculous like that, he needs to wake up: your health is at stake.

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Belle1154 Posts : 235 Registered: 11/2/06
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 25, 2008 8:56 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

ok, I am a virgin bride too and TOTALLY get the fear of anything entering the vagina that is not a tampon, ESPECIALLY a doctor's metal clamp.  But

GETTHE EXAM!!!

It is good for your health and completely necessary for having sex.  And doctors will know after that exam what method of birth control is best for you.  There are SO many different versions of "the pill" now. Yes, the checkup sucks.  Yes, it is uncomfortable.  But it is WORTH it. 

And the hymen thing?  I am hoping mine is broken already because breaking your hymen during sex can make things more painful and bloody. 


 

"I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine..."

I marry my prince on April 19, 2008

 http://weddings.partyspace.com/dianaallen


Message was edited by: Belle1154

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NJ4Life Posts : 3,358 Registered: 8/10/07
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Mar 26, 2008 4:42 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Thats extremely irresponsible of you to not get an exam. I was taught that a woman should start seeing her ob/gyn at the age of 18 or when she becomes sexually active, which ever comes first,

A random person is not going to be able to tell you which pill is right for you without examining you.

And to be honest, when I first had sex I didnt bleed one bit...So maybe I had a "hymen" maybe I didnt. But I learned that it can break if youre a gymnast or a dancer or from riding a bike.

The "hymen" does not equal virgin.  The fact that you never laid with a man before does. And its a poor excuse to no see a Dr.


Formerly Ama102707

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Guest
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: Apr 17, 2008 6:54 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

To finallyabride08: Planned Parenthood will tell you the same thing, hon. You have to get a pelvic exam. But don't worry--I had them done years before I had sex for the first time and no damage was inflicted, I promise! However, if you are really concerned about it I think you should schedule an appointment with your doctor just to talk. Express your concerns and ask questions. Your doctor will be happy to explain what will happen during the exam and can give you more information about different types of birth control available. I did this myself before I went for my first exam and it made me feel a lot better. The exam itself is very short, and even though it is somewhat uncomfortable, it's really not that bad and over very quickly. You'll be fine! congratulations on your wedding and good luck to you!

 to madlyinlove09: Two words, which have already been mentioned here, can't be mentioned enough: lube and foreplay. Your body needs time to relax, and you have to be assertive about letting him know that--guys tend to rush since it isn't as much of a building-up process for them to be ready for sex. Just take it slow, allow yourself to have an orgasm before you try intercourse, and lube up. I use this product called Wet, check it out because you can order it discreetly from Amazon and it is the best one I have ever used. And also keep in mind that if things are awkward or painful/uncomfortable at first--don't worry! It isn't the end of the world and it doesn't mean you'll never like or look forward to sex. My first time went like this: "ouch...ouch...oh, wait, that's it? that's what all the fuss was about?" You have your whole marriage to practice though, and the key is communication--you and your husband have to agree from the beginning that you will talk as openly about sex as everything else in your marriage, be honest with one another about your needs and be attentive to one another's wishes. and it will be great--congratulations to you!

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nmtgirl Posts : 142 Registered: 2/12/07
Re: First time sex on honeymoon
Posted: May 12, 2008 3:06 AM Go to message in response to: Guest

If he's a virgin too, you may want to do what I did! When I lost my virginity, my BF at the time was also a virgin and clueless. The way he was doing it hurt. A lot! So we switched so that I was on top. That let me control how much happened at once and how much it hurt. He also guided me by holding my hips and it was really sweet. It felt amazing (like guaranteed orgasm) and I also controlled the pain the first couple of times! I don't know if that will work for everyone but it did for me! 

Ashley and Paul - June 19, 2010

www.mywedding.com/reidmontgomery



 

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