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To Keep or To Change: Last Names

Online Users: 357 guest(s), 0 user(s). Replies: 43

looseygoosey Posts : 122 Registered: 5/2/06
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 16, 2007 10:31 AM Go to message in response to: Guest

I changed my name. I really never wanted to stay my maiden name. It definitely sounded better but I wanted us to be one unit and I was proud to be associated with him. 

I know many women opt to keep their maiden name as their middle name. Both my mom and my MIL did that. That way you can keep both. Just a suggestion.


"I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see." John Burroughs

 


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LochNessie Posts : 1,631 Registered: 4/2/07
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 16, 2007 12:17 PM Go to message in response to: sposabella

Hey Bella:

I lived in Brampton before I moved to Burlington in kindergarten!  I have family friends who still live there.  My grandparents and Dad's family live near by - in Oakville, Streetsville and Mississauga.  It sure is great to find another Canuck on this site. :)

-Ness 



 

And when you say forever can't you see you've already captured me. - Mae 

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sposabella Posts : 49 Registered: 4/22/07
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 16, 2007 8:25 PM Go to message in response to: LochNessie

I have spent time in all those places. Also, I noticed you are getting married in North Carolina... so did I! And from the looks of it we have the same engagement ring! Small world!

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Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 17, 2007 5:43 PM Go to message in response to: looseygoosey

I just read this great article on SavvyMiss.com about the debate over whether or not you should take on your husband's name once you get married. Great opinions, but I'm still torn!

 Take a look by following this link:

http://savvymiss.com/love-advice/hitched/hitched-archive/article/should-a-woman-take-her-husbands-name-924.html 

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Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 17, 2007 6:10 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I' am totaly a keeper.  We're living in the 21st century, and we shouldn't be treated like our husband's property.  Besides, I have a pretty established career, so I didn't even consider changing my name.  Good luck!

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Mrslinnben Posts : 2,286 Registered: 6/4/07
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 19, 2007 10:43 AM Go to message in response to: sposabella

Hi Nessie & Sposabella, my husband is Canadian (he was born in Toronto.  His brother is in Brampton & he has family in Burlington)..

Anyway, I changed my last name.  I will ALSWAYS be a maiden name at heart.  Just because I am changing my last name, doesn't change who I am. 

Taking my husbands name doesn't mean that he controls me, nor do I control him.  We are equals in this marriage.  We make joint decisions.  He has his time & I have my time.   

If we are blessed with children (we are both in our 40's) our children will take the last name as well. 


Good luck, happy planning & happy wedding day

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LizS Posts : 1,982 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 20, 2007 4:45 PM Go to message in response to: Mrslinnben

CHANGED!!!!

My last name was a German name that was hard for everyone to spell and pronounce.  AND, I love the idea of having the same last name as my husband and our future children.  I think sometimes people get confused when parents and their kids have different last names...pure ignorance IMO!  LOL!  My new last name is easy to pronounce and spell!  YEAH!!!!!  I am proud to have the same last name as my husband and it makes everything seem more official and finalized now.  More like we will be together forever, you know?

Either way, I know people that have done both and I say do what's best for YOU.  There's really no right or wrong answer. 


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Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 24, 2007 6:54 PM Go to message in response to: LizS

I want to keep mine and add his to it.  Is it possible to just add his to mine without the hyphen? I have always hated my last name but now I feel weird about not having it.

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SoonToBeAnother... Posts : 24 Registered: 3/21/07
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 24, 2007 8:41 PM Go to message in response to: LochNessie

I'm changing my last name.  I'll go from people not being able to pronounce my last name to something kinda boring, but oh well.  It wouldn't feel right if we were married and I kept my last name, and hyphenating it would be WAY to many letters.  Taking his name make me feel like we're one unit, together forever.  Plus I don't get along with my family, so my name doesn't really mean that much to me.  

 

Ken & Nola

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MrsMcDAtLast Posts : 860 Registered: 1/1/07
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 25, 2007 1:37 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Definitely a changer! I don't care for the sound of my maiden name; it's not very attractive sounding in my opinion, and has been a bit of a source of ridicule when I was younger. Plus, there aren't a lot of last names that sound good with my first name, IMO, which is Michelle. But Michelle McDowall sounds great, almost rhymes! Plus, I just wanted to change it to my new hubby's name, and have the same name as our children, etc.

MrsSensat: Yes, you can absolutely add his name onto the end of yours. I know a woman whose maiden name was Wyatt, and her new husband's name is Smith, so she became Wyattsmith. The only thing was, people tended to hyphenate it, even though she hadn't hyphenated it. She eventually dropped her maiden name and just went with her husband's name, anyway. 


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Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 29, 2007 6:44 PM Go to message in response to: MrsMcDAtLast

I will tack Fh's name onto the end of mine and have four initials.  DSAF. I never considered not changing my name, even before I knew him.  He also would like it if I changed my name.  I'm going to do it even though I don't like his name.  I like my maiden name because it starts with an A and it represents my ethnicity...  But to me changing the name when I get married is just what I feel I am supposed to do, and I'm totally okay with it whether it means I am a subservient unmodern woman or not. :)

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Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 29, 2007 9:35 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

I'm a changer!

I think it's a personal decision and that neither choice is right or wrong. Taking your husband's name does not make you subservient and keeping your last name does not make you less devoted to your husband.

That being said, I can't wait to take my FH's last name. We laughed so hard when we realized my new intials would be M.E.S. because he always tells me what a mess I am (not that I'm a slob but I have a way of making things worse when I try to fix them or clean them up). I have a daughter from a previous relationship and she has my maiden name. My FH is adopting her so when it's all said and done we will all have the same last name.

I guess I am really old fashioned when it comes to this stuff. I can't wait to have a son and name him after my FH. May make some wanna puke but it's just the way I feel.


Mo

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Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 30, 2007 5:23 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

My soon-to-be inlaws actually asked if Steven was going to take MY last name!  While that would be a cool twist on the old tradition, I am truly honored to take my future husband's name.  I am going to add it to the end of mine, making my maiden name my middle name.  I don't have a middle name, so it will rather nice to have something to put in the little middle initial box on forms!  Haha!! 

 Also, we moved our wedding date up (it was originally going to be November of next year) so that we would be married when I finished my masters degree and will therefore have my married name on my diploma. Laughing


Daisypath Ticker

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LizS Posts : 1,982 Registered: 3/30/06
Re: To Keep or To Change: Last Names
Posted: Jul 31, 2007 5:05 PM Go to message in response to: Guest

Mrs. Sensat-

Some people choose to make their maiden last name their middle name or 2nd middle name.  So, if your maiden name was Susan Marie Smith and your husband is Randy Jones, your new name would be Susan Smith Jones or Susan Marie Smith Jones.  Those are the options I know of.


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