Can I ask for RSVP on the Save the Date cards ? the wedding is in Dec. & we're on a tight budget. We'd like to invite friends we've had to exclude so far. I thought since some guest might already have holiday plans, maybe we could find out earlier if they will be able to attend. Oh and it's also on a Friday evening.. Thanks
We tried that since we got married in France, to try to get an idea of who all thought that they would be able to come all this distance. It didn't really work because people aren't really used to responding to a Save the Date, it is too far away for them to really think about, and a lot of people say they will come then change their minds as it gets closer, or originally think that they can't come, say no, find out they can come, then not know what to do. ex/ seven months before "Oh wow! A wedding in France! I always wanted to visit there. We will definetely be there!" two months before- "Uhh, I know we said we were coming, but it is kind of expensive and uh we had to pay for X unexpected expense, so even though we already said yes, we aren't coming."
You can't put an RSVP on a Save the Date, since thats what the formal invitation is for, and I think its a little early for invites at this point. An STD is just to give people a head's up of the date and city/state your getting married in. A lot times you'll hear through the grapevine after you've sent out the STDs about who may not attend, which can give you a better idea of how many people you can plan on not attending. By the way, the rule of thumb is to expect about 20% of your guests to not attend.
Also, I'm guessing from your name that your date is Dec. 8th, which I think might be too early in December to bank on people already having holiday plans, but hey thats just my 2 cents :)