My in-laws live across the country from mid october-late May, so we don't really have a problem with sharing the holidays. That could be a big dilema, though, if you in-laws live in the area year round. I've heard of couples spending Christmas Eve with one family and Christmas day with the other. If the two sets live close enough you could spend half the day with one family and half the day with the other. My husband does have an aunt in the area, so sometimes we'll spend the afternoon at my family's house and the evening at his aunts house. Hopefully, both your families will be willing to work with you on this and come to a compromise..that definitely helps with the stress level.