Re: TV Thread!!! Discuss IDOL, DWTS, THE OFFICE, HOUSE,whatever....
Posted: Feb 16, 2010 8:00 PM
The BACHELOR Review:
So, thisweeks episode was sooo hilariously ridiculous, I actually took notes. MisterKelley(dh) was half-watching with me and mocking like crazy, so I wrote down some of his best and funniest comments along with my own observations. This show is so beyond silly and so obviously staged at this point. Realitysteves blog is RIGHT ON so far,and I have no doubts it will remain that way.
Jake and Gias date:
Sillyness. I laughed out loud when he said to her "youre really very deep." Ummm, hello? Really? Please Jake, give me one example, just ONE, of Gias deepness. Yeah, thats what I thought. Shes about as deep as plywood. And can she stop with the fingers to the mouth and the brushing her fingettips along her lips? All the time? Its so annoying. Their nasty openmouthed kisses were pretty disgusting as well. He sooooo wants to bone her. I wonder if they did it in the fantasy suite before he sent her ass packin back to NYC. Cuz technically, he can screw 3 girls in one week just for the hell of it. The whole idea of the fantasy suite was cracking me and MisterK UP. We were imaginging what the dumb card REALLY said or what Jake was thinking " Dear Jake and Gia, use this key to go and screw each others brains out. We will turn the camera off for 10min so you can F**k. Then Do the same with all the other remaining girls, and bring them to the EXACT SAME SUITE with the same roses and bed and hottub and everything else and act like they are special. Have a great f&&k. Love, creepy Chris Harrison."
MisterKelleys best line: Hey, Im sure they change the bedsheets and put new rose pedals down for each of the three whores. What more do you want?
Jake and Tenleys date:
Okay. Again with the flying scene? And again with the "On the Wings of Looooove" song .... really? I love how the show has at LEAST 3-5 flying montages in EVERY SEASON with minimum of 3 diff. girls, yet each time they do it, they act as if its the first time they have EVER shown the Bachelor with a girl flying and looking out at the city. GAG. Its soooo fake and staged. How many times can you have the same exact fixed romance? And could Jake be any more cheesy? "Its like a fairy tale up here...." Ummm, this show IS a fairytale you idiot.
And the dancing ... gag again. I had to actually fast forward through them dancing together because the sheer sappiness of it was making me wanna barf.
Misterkelleys best line: After Jake tells Tenley how he really wants her to open her heart, MK says "Yeah right .. Im sure its her HEART you wanna open up, ya perv."
Jake and Vienna:
She is ugly. Sorry, but she is. Looks like Tori Spelling from her 90210 days. Ick. Her eyes always look like she got hit in the face with a baseball bat. Doesnt she look like she just got a black eye? That chick doesnt know how to put on eye maekup or something.
Jakes stupidest line: "I need that immaturity." Ewwww. What? So you WANT a 5yr old as your wife? I used to like him, but week after week, he just gets cheesier and cheesier and hes kind of dumb and lame. They were acting like children on their date, and not in a cute fun way either, just in an annoying way. Gee you wacky kids are sooooo silly. When they were climbing the ship sail, I said to DH "woudlnt it be awesome if they both fell to their death right now?" I know. Mean.
When they went to the fantasy suite, I half expected Viennas creepy trailor park daddy to jump out and be like "hey now little girl, dont you get started on that without yer daddy!" And Vienna KEPT saying how shes NEVER been in love before. Over and over. Okay, Im sorry, but how old are you? 26 at least right? And youve NEVER been in love? Weird.
If Jake says "Im in love with three different women, all for completely different reasons!" one more time, I might have to murder him. What bullshit. How are you IN LOVE WITH three people? This show is hysterical.
THE ALI PHONE CALL: Totally lame, manipulative,and pointless. The whole thing was just a way to get the audience to feel badly for her, like her more, because she WILL be the next Bachelorette, according to realitysteve. And I believe him. He said after she left the show, shes still contracted to the show until the shows end ... so if they want to tell her to CALL JAKE so they can make it dramatic, they will do that. So thats what they did. At the very least, that call was suggested by the producers. I guarantee you shes the next Bachelorette.
Even though Gia has the intelligence and depth of a postage stamp, I did feel really badly for her when Jake sent her packing. The girl really started to think he was into her, and he probably gave her a good screwing in the fantasy suite, then sent her home lol. But wow, shes sucha little girl wiht the hair twisting and all that. But she was really hurt.