I need to get something off my chest but am afraid to talk with my real life friends about this. My soon-to-be-husband and I have known each other since high school. His best friend, John, also since that time, moved across the country after college, married a girl no one really knew and had been in and out of touch through the years ever since. About six months ago, my fiance gets a call from his buddy that he's getting divorce and moving back. They have been spending a lot of time together since John's return and I'm getting very bad feelings about it. John is officially single, going out and hooking up. All he talks about is how free he feels, how fun life is again. Meanwhile, my fiance and I are starting to fight a lot about money, wedding plans, etc. I'm starting to think he's regretting proposing and is thinking about backing out!! I don't know if I should just let this play out or tell FI to stop hanging with his friend? Anyone been through something similar?
It is not unusual for the groom, or the bride, to have jitters about getting married. However, the friend may be a negative influence, particularly if he is telling your fiance about all the things that went wrong in his marriage. Have the two of you had premarital counseling? If not, that should be your first step. Counseling will help get the issues out into the light with the help of a neutral third party who can help you work through issues you may be having.