That sounds very stressful. I understand why you're upset. I'm very sentimental, too, and engagement rings are, more than anything else I think, symbols. I am surprised that they even tried to size that ring down. It was a horrible idea for them to do that. I have a size 3 1/4 ring finger and I was told that anything other than solitaires and the simpler three stone rings could not be sized for me. I had to special order my ring in a size 4 1/2 (the smallest it came in) and have it sized from there. I did look into Kay's, but ultimately didn't get my ring from them, though the store we did go with is owned by the same company (Mark's and Morgan). Thinking back on it, though, the people who worked there did all have different ideas about what should be done and such. One guy suggested that the ring could be sized down and we could special order one in the meantime and keep whichever one we liked better. Mark's and Morgan gave me the bigger ring to wear with a sizer while we wait. I'm eager to get my actual ring, but this works in the meantime.
Anyway, I hope you are able to get a new ring that you love and that can be the symbol you both desire. Also, congratulations on getting engaged to your lost love. That's beautiful.
I am so sorry to hear about your troubles. I disagree strongly that a wedding ring is just a material item. That is like saying your kids first picture is just another picture. A wedding band is a symbol, yes. It is a symbol of the eternal bond between man and wife. The ring should represent the unbroken circle. I had something similar happen to my wifes ring. We bought it from a local jewelry store as Art Carved jewelry. It was gorgeous. She was a tiny thing so we had to have the ring sized down and when it was returned, the band was thin enough to cut yourself on. When we brought it to their attention, they stated "We should have known it would be that small." No, I rely on jewelry professional to tell me such things and make suggestions based on their expertise. This is why Kay failed so badly I imagine. Their sales people are just hourly employees with little to no jewelry experience.
Our solution was to send it to an actual jeweler. Someone with experience. We found this website, Aurell Wedding Bands and started talking to a guy there. He suggested we get another band set and fixed next to the original one and did an excellent job on the repair. We were able to keep the ring that I proposed with thank goodness. Pay no attention to the shaking heads you see around here dear, they obviously do not treasure the symbol of their eternal love as much as you do. This can say heaps about how they likely feel about their marriage.